Paul Fussell was a great writer and scholar and, in the three years before his death yesterday, an Oregonian.

Obituaries are beginning to appear around the world, but the best honor one could pay to the man is to read his writing. Fussell stripped war of heroism and romance. His voice was steady, clear and honest and on basically every subject, worth hearing.

In the excerpt below, from a 1982 essay on his experiences during the American invasion of Vichy France in World War II, Fussell explains how he came to his subject:

Everyone knows that a night relief is among the most difficult of infantry maneuvers. But we didn’t know it, and in our innocence we expected it to go according to plan. We and the company we were replacing were cleverly and severely shelled; it was as if the Germans a few hundred feet away could see us in the dark and through the thick pine growth. When the shelling finally stopped, at about midnight, we realized that although near the place we were supposed to be, until daylight we were hopelessly lost.

The order came down to stop where we were, lie down among the trees, and get some sleep. We would finish the relief at first light. Scattered over several hundred yards, the 250 of us in F Company lay down in a darkness so thick we could see nothing at all. Despite the terror of our first shelling (and several people had been hit), we slept as soundly as babes.

At dawn I awoke, and what I saw all around were numerous objects I’d miraculously not tripped over in the dark. These objects were dozens of dead German boys in greenish-gray uniforms, killed a day or two before by the company we were relieving. If darkness had hidden them from us, dawn disclosed them with open eyes and greenish-white faces like marble, still clutching their rifles and machine pistols in their seventeen-year-old hands, fixed where they had fallen. (For the first time I understood the German phrase for the war dead: die Gefallenen.)

Michelangelo could have made something beautiful out of these forms, in the Dying Gaul tradition, and I was startled to find that at first, in a way I couldn’t understand, they struck me as beautiful. But after a moment no feeling but shock and horror.

My adolescent illusions, largely intact to that moment, fell away all at once, and I suddenly knew I was not and never would be in a world that was reasonable or just. The scene was less apocalyptic than shabbily ironic: it sorted so ill with modern popular assumptions about the idea of progress and attendant improvements in public health, social welfare, and social justice.

To transform guiltless boys into cold marble after passing them through unbearable fear and humiliation and pain and contempt seemed to do them an interesting injustice.

I decided to ponder these things.

The scene at the farmers market starts long before the crowds show up.

On a sunny Wednesday morning, vendors at the Shemanski Park farmers market are setting up during the hour before opening, deftly arranging their fruits and vegetables into artistic displays and chatting among themselves.

Thursday, May 24: Tragedy, Stoneburner, Spectral Tombs
I reviewed Tragedy’s towering new LP for this week’s paper, and you can read my glowing praise here. Short version: Darker Days Ahead is Tragedy’s best album yet, a dynamic and harrowing collection of top-notch contemporary crust. It’s really exciting to see a band stick around long enough to summon something so grand and expansive. This show is going to be packed; if you don’t get there early, you’re not getting in.
LISTEN!

Friday, May 25: The Estranged, Vanna Inget, Sundaze, Futility, DJ Unruly
There are bigger and more epoch-defining bands playing the Know this week, but it is Vanna Inget I’m most excited about seeing. This Swedish quartet’s straightforward melodic punk rock veers into saccharine pop-punk when it’s not flirting with classic UK sounds, and it’s all so incredibly polished and perfectly integrated that it makes me a little bit mad. I’m thinking this is what would happen to Arctic Flowers after a dose of happy pills. Consider this my Pick of the Week.
LISTEN!

Saturday, May 26: Effluxus, Bloodkrow Butcher, Silencer, DJ Skell
Bloodkrow Butcher and Effluxus both traffic in by-the-book D-beat that doesn’t add much to the inexplicably teeming realm of the punk world still smitten with Discharge, but both bands are very good at what they do, even if I’m not too keen on the splinter of punk they can’t seem to pluck from their heads.
LISTEN!

Sunday, May 27: Youthbitch, Cafeteria Dance Fever, The Shivas
The Know’s Memorial Week marathon catches its breath at the midpoint by taking a break from the crusty stuff and handing the stage over to some rather less pissed and considerably more hummable local garage rock. The stench of rotting Amebix patches will linger into Sunday evening, but by the time Youthbitch tears through a few of its swaggering pop-punk songs, plans for smashing the state will give way to thoughts of broken hearts.
LISTEN!

Monday, May 28: Weekend Nachos, Transient, Raw Nerves, Sidetracked
Do Portland crowds ever “go off”? Because I don’t see a lot of “going off” at shows. Which is weird, really, but refreshing too, because there’s little worse than a bunch of dudes “going off” when I’m trying to enjoy myself. The thrown elbows and sloppy karate kicks that define a session of “going off” have no place in the semi-adult world I try to live in, but I will make a rare allowance for this show, because Weekend Nachos is from Illinois, where I’m pretty sure there is a law against NOT “going off” when there is powerviolence in the vicinity, and Weekend Nachos is pretty damn good at the fast and tight and mean kind of hardcore that defined my teens, and yeah, I might “go off” with y’all if you’re game.
LISTEN!

Tuesday, May 29: Antisect, Deathcharge, Vicious Pleasures
Crass and Subhumans were pretty much it for me in terms of classic anarcho punk when I was a lad spun on spiky things, so I didn’t delve into Antisect’s gnarled noise until fairly recently, when a late night that ended with a Crass tattoo on my ankle led me to do some panicked research of the “money where your mouth is” variety. Which means I haven’t been anticipating this Antisect reunion for more than a few months, while some have waited a lifetime to see this legend in the flesh. Whatever your level of investment in this slice of punk history, the mere fact of Antisect’s presence in such a humble venue should be enough to get your body into what will surely be a very long queue on Alberta.
LISTEN!

Wednesday, May 30: Unnatural Helpers, Divers, Sick Secrets, Tensions, DJ Ken Dirtnap
I’ve probably written more about Divers than any other Portland punk band in the past couple months. Its “Glass Chimes” single has been a constant companion this year, a much-needed reminder that punk rock is still capable of stirring up complex feelings in this husk of a man. It makes me want to cry; it makes me want to start a band; it makes me want to make out in the rain with someone pretty and kind; it makes me want to live the right way, whatever and wherever that right way might be.
LISTEN!

In another sign of the difficult financial realities for print newspapers, the New Orleans Times-Picayune, a sister paper of The Oregonian, will publish a hard-copy edition only three days a week starting this fall, the paper announced. 

The paper will publish Wednesday, Friday and Sunday, while beefing up online coverage the other four days of the week. In announcing the changes, the paper cited "revolutionary upheaval in the newspaper industry." The newspaper made the announcement after the New York Times broke the story Wednesday night.

The Times-Picayune won a couple of Pulitzer prizes in 2006 for its coverage of Hurricane Katrina. The Oregonian and the New Orleans daily are owned by the Newhouse family's Advance Publications. Those two papers—along with the Cleveland Plain Dealer and the Newark, N.J., Star-Ledger—are the company's flagship papers. 

Updated at 12:34 pm

A media-industry blog, Poynter.org reports that three Advance papers in Alabama will also move to a three-days per week production schedule.

WW has just learned we left a couple quite a few clues out of this week's Jonesin'.

We'd like to say this puzzle is specifically for experts, and you should view this error as a challenge. But that seems unfair to the non-experts. 

Here are the missing Across is the full list of clues:

Across

1 ___ nectar

6 Give the cold shoulder

10 Old El ___ (salsa brand)

14 Tennis champ Rafael

15 Petty of "Tank Girl"

16 "Like ___ not!"

17 Get a gold nose ring?

19 Firehouse fixture

20 ___-Bilt (power tool brand)

21 Feel sick

22 Electric guitar pioneer

24 Morales of "NYPD Blue"

26 She tells you to wear clean underwear

28 Talks big

29 River that starts in the Swiss Alps

31 Fable ending

33 Peg for Bubba Watson

34 Vending machine drinks

35 ___ Puffs

37 Report from the musical instrument store?

42 Li'l comic strip character

43 Joe amount

45 Had hash browns

48 Immigration island

50 Cornered

51 Scary Bela

53 A, in Austria

55 Sea birds

56 Get someone mad

58 Negative answers

60 Cleopatra's killer

61 Historical novelist ___ Seton

62 Finish up with Tom's wife?

65 Anorak, e.g.

66 Caustic substances

67 "___ Man" (1992 hit by Positive K)

68 Late actress Bancroft

69 Ivy League school with its own golf course

70 Mr. Jeter

Down

1 Crossword solutions

2 "Win Ben Stein's Money," e.g.

3 Capital of South Australia

4 Michael's "Batman" successor

5 Jazz legend Fitzgerald

6 Downhill event

7 Postal creed word

8 River through Russia

9 Attack the attacker

10 Maid of honor at William and Kate's 2011 wedding

11 Words said while raising glasses

12 It's dissolved into a solvent

13 Ultimatum ending

18 Khloe's sister

23 It's just him or her on stage

25 "Dancing With the Stars" judge Carrie Ann ___

27 "Whose Line Is It Anyway?" regular Colin

30 Paul Anka hit subtitled "That Kiss!"

32 Go bad

36 Sky-blue

38 With really long odds

39 Toothpaste variety

40 Smooth player

41 Aptly-named precursor to Wikipedia

44 Jargon with lots of bold claims

45 Andean animal

46 Plus in the dating world

47 "The Sweet Hereafter" director Atom ___

49 Gary who played Lieutenant Dan

52 Egg-shaped

54 Quebec rejection

57 Singer formerly of the group Clannad

59 Make tire marks

63 Tierra ___ Fuego

64 What some golfers use as a scoring goal

 The project: The Chicharones Bring It Back To Warped Tour

Who's behind the project? Longtime WW favorites and the best damn pig-based hip-hop group around, The Chicharones. 

Why do they want your money? The kids have been asked to headline the "Bring It Back" stage on this year's Warped Tour. The whole tour, all summer. But because the bands like Chicharones don't get paid to be on the tour, they need some cash to help get a full band from one end of the U.S. to the next. 

What are they offering in return? Small dollar donors will pick up an advance copy of the group's new album Swine Flew before the release date. Midlevel donors get signed copies of all the Chicharones albums, a t-shirt, and a special video shout out. And for the big ticket donors (we're talking $350 - $3,000), the group with either cover a song of your choosing, give you a signed pig mask worn by DJ Zone, write you an original song, or perform at a house party for you and your posse. 

How much are they asking for? $10,000

Will they be fully funded? With 20 days to go and only $1,100 picked up as of this writing, the odds aren't necessarily looking too hot. But, that's still nearly three more weeks to get the word out and raise the scratch. 

Our final assessment: If you've seen the group perform, you know there is no doubt that the Chicharones can bring it on stage. And goodness knows they have done their time in the hip-hop trenches. This could be a huge break for Sleep, Zone, Josh Martinez, and the whole crew. A captive audience of teens, tweens, and their handlers night after night...not to mention the networking possibilities of getting in good with the rest of the emo/punk/metalcore contingent? That could do wonders for these guys. Do as we likely to do and dig deep to help make this incredible opportunity a reality. 

Speaking of money in politics…

U.S. Sen. Jeff Merkley (D-OR) is among those speaking on the Senate floor today in favor of a legislative effort to roll back the unlimited corporate donations permitted by the Supreme Court's Citizens United decision.

"The Supreme Court, with #CitizensUnited, attacked the heart of our Constitution," Merkley Tweeted this morning.

You can watch the speechifying live over at C-SPAN 2.

Merkley and Oregon's senior U.S. senator, Ron Wyden, are among 43 co-sponsors of a bill by U.S. Sen. Sheldon Whitehouse (D-R.I.) to place additional disclosure requirements on "super PACs," the monster campaign finance committees empowered by the 2010 high court ruling. 

Oregon, which places no limits on campaign financing, was not among 22 states that this week joined a legal fight, led by Montana, to ask the Supreme Court to overturn its decision.

Andy Baio is one of Portland's most influential geeks. The former Chief Technology Officer of Kickstarter, he's been writing his hugely influential blog waxy.org for a decade and done a bunch of other stuff you can read about on his Wikipedia page.

This morning, Baio—along with Belfast-based Build festival organizer Andy McMillan—launched one of his most ambitious projects to date: a "disruptive creativity" festival called XOXO, slated to take place in Portland September 13-16 at YU Contemporary.

The festival will be split up into three parts:

1) A conference, with an impressive lineup of speakers, including "the leaders of amazingly creative communities like Etsy, Kickstarter, Canvas and Metafilter, the fiercely independent creators behind World of Goo, MakerBot, Indie Game: The Movie, Star Wars Uncut, Diesel Sweeties and Black Apple, and industry-changing startups like the Atavist, Simple, CASH Music, and VHX.tv."

2) A "PAX/Maker Faire" style marketplace, with local creators and artists showing and selling their work.

3) "Fringe" events around the city, including film screening, indie videogames, craft beer and live music.

The catch? He's funding the whole thing through Kickstarter. As of printing, the festival has raised $56,963 of its $125,000 goal, since it launched at 11 am this morning. One hundred and thirty-five people have already bought tickets—at $400 a pop—to the conference portion of the festival.

But can XOXO raise enough to become a reality? We caught up with Baio on the phone earlier today:

WW: Forty-five thousand dollars in a few hours, that's insane
Andy Baio: Just. Crazy. It's $47,280 now, it's nuts. Every time I step away from the computer to go do something else, I come back and it's gone up by thousands of dollars. I ran a Kickstarter project in the early days, I produced an album called Kind of Bloop (a chiptune version of Miles Davis' Kind of Blue), and at the time, my project was considered to be a huge success—I had a $2,000 goal, and it hit the goal in two hours, and that ended up being $8,600. But the scale now, the scale is so big, and the community, and the social features that are on Kickstarter now—before I'd even tweeted it, it had 50 backers.

How many people had you told you were doing this beforehand?
I had told not that many, I pretty much worked on it in secret. Obviously I was working with Andy McMillan, who works in Belfast, he organizes the Build conference there—it's an awesome design conference he does every year. Aside from that, it was me reaching out to speakers and then just a very small handful of close friends. But most people I know did not know I'd been working on this.

So you've got to pay $400 to get the full ticket?
Yeah, as it turns out, organizing conferences on this scale are very expensive. We budgeted it out, and it was us looking at everything we wanted to do, and not compromise on the venue and the way we wanted to do it. We could have done it at the Convention Center, which is how most of these things go, but there's not a lot of character there. But the benefit you get is that all of your comforts are taken care of: you have a stage and audio and video and it's wired for wireless Internet access already and power. [Yu Contemporary] is amazing, but it's a blank canvas. So we're building a stage, doing seating, dropping in wireless via satellite, doing our own audio and video.

Where did the idea come from?
This is something I wanted to do for years. I'm not working at Kickstarter anymore, but the time when I was, when i first met those guys in 2008, the idea for Kickstarter was inspired by an event—the original idea was to do conditional fundraising for events. Perry Chen came up with the idea, he wanted to do a concert in New Orleans in 2001. He thought it was so stupid that you have to front all this risk, pay for everything upfront without knowing if it was going to be a success or not. And if you could just sell the tickets, and if it didn't sell enough, it just backs off and nobody's charged. That was the original seed of the idea for Kickstarter. When I met those guys before they built anything, I thought "My God, what an incredible use for the site."

But where did the idea for what the actual conference would be about come from?
It stemmed from a couple things. One, I've been going to SXSW Interactive for the last couple of years and it's always been incredible—I love this incredible, unique feeling that comes from getting like-minded creative people in the same place at the same time. But what's happened over the last few years is, the interests of SXSW have sort of deviated as it's grown. It's huge, and it seems to me that it's more about the business and marketing of technology than it is about creative people doing creative things with technology. And actually, that is still the core of SXSW Interactive, but there's so many other people doing other things that it drowns that out. The end result is when I go, I can't even find the people I care about—it's a signal to noise ratio issue.

So that's one part. The other part is, we're in this incredible moment right now, there's this Cambrian explosion of creativity that's happening, enabled by the Internet, enabled by technology. And every one of those existing middle men you used to have to go through, it seems like everyone's realizing that you don't need a record label—music was maybe first to realize this, but it's happening across the board now: comic book artists, video game developers... Using something like Kickstarter, it's been absolutely transformative for each one of those communities. And not just Kickstarter, communities like Etsy, where all of a sudden "poof" there's a marketplace where there was previously not a marketplace. People are able to make a living doing what they love.

Julia Nunes, for example, who's going to be speaking and performing at XOXO, she found her audience on YouTube. She was just recording ukulele covers in her dorm room. I remember seeing her cover of Weezer's "Keep Fishin'," and I thought "Oh my God, she's so awesome," and watched all her other videos and so did a lot of other people. And they subscribed, and she built this following that grew so big that Ben Folds saw her cover of one of his songs, she ended up going on tour with Ben Folds. She puts out an album funded through Kickstarter and then she's on Conan O'brien. This is the trajectory now.

And obviously Justin Bieber [was discovered online], but the difference with people like Justin Bieber is they were discovered through YouTube, but then funneled right into the traditional publishing system. And so seeing film makers like the two brilliant people behind Indie Game: The Movie fund that entirely on Kickstarter, then sell it through their website, set up screenings using a sponsorship through Adobe to do screening across the United States, they maintained 100 percent creative control and more importantly, 100 percent ownership over their work. They never had to sacrifice anything. It was more work, but the end result was they are going to be able to capitalize on their own work for the rest of their lives.

To me, that's incredible. We're in this amazing era, and it's something I've been following for a long time. I've been writing about Internet culture on my site for 10 years, I'm friends with a lot of really interesting people that have done this independently. I wanted to do an event that would bring all of them together in one place.

Is it "ex-oh-ex-oh"?
Yeah, I think "ex-oh" for short. A couple of people have asked me about the name, and for me it just makes sense. It's people doing what they love, that love connecting with people that love their work. The whole thing is like a mutual admiration society. So yeah, hugs and kisses.

I thought we had an amazing lineup of speakers, and we do, but seeing the list of attendees? Is blowing my mind. It's exactly what I dreamed about. You could spin off ten conferences just based on the people who are coming to this thing.

The conference is really only one-third of this project. What I wanted to do for everyone ho is coming from out of town—and it sounds like a lot of people are coming from out of town, especially the speakers—is showing them the Portland that I love—bringing them here in September when the weather tends to be best, bringing them to this awesome venue, and bringing the best of the Portland's creative community, that maker culture, bringing them all in and setting them up on the ground floor of the Yu Contemporary to share and sell their stuff, I think is going to be amazing. The Fringe events we're doing the two days before are intended to get people out into the city, exploring the businesses and places we love... showing the best of the city.
 
So you've picked a pretty festival-heavy time of year to run this thing. It's going to be close or overlap with MusicfestNW and WW's own tech festival Portland Digital eXperience, as well as PICA's Time Based Art festival.
Most everybody is coming in from out of town, so I think it makes everybody's [festival] better. I think they'll be complementary. The Portland Digital eXperience, we've been talking with [the curator], and that's more driven on the local technology scene, much more driven around startups, which is not what XO is about. And hopefully there'll be some people that come in for PDX and just stick around Portland for XOXO. And ultimately, having TBA going at the same time, that's so awesome. If you want to check out something in the evening that's outside the festival programming for XO? Awesome. I love TBA.

Is this a one-off event or will you run another next year?
I certainly hope so. This is the thing about Kickstarter: you never know where it's going to go. Yeah it's going strong now, but maybe it plateaus, maybe we don't make it. But the feeling—we launched it at 11 this morning and we're almost to $50,000—the feeling is that this is something people want, and if it works well, then yeah, I'd love to do it again.

An audit by the State of Oregon has found school districts missed out on $40 million of potential energy savings by an ineffective use of money intended to help them save energy.

The audit found that during 2009 and 2010, schools received $15.7 million for energy efficiency measures, such as improved lighting, heating and insulation.

But after examining 6,859 measures taken by schools across Oregon from 2002 to 2010, the audit found:

"....that school districts did not consistently implement the most cost-effective
measures or realize the greatest energy savings. We estimate that, had
districts implemented the top-ranked measures instead, they could
potentially have achieved almost $40 million more in anticipated district
utility bill savings and gained an additional 70% energy reduction over the
collective lives of the measures compared to the estimated results of those
measures that were actually implemented."

• conferring stronger authority to the Department of Energy or another entity to review and approve school districts' planned energy measures;
• providing more specific guidance on cost-effectiveness results or other desired outcomes for the measures; and
• revising the methodology for allocating energy surcharge funds to prioritize high energy use school buildings or providing the Oregon Department of Energy with authority to reallocate future funds from districts with large balances to districts with more high energy use school buildings.   

We're not going to record every donation to the new political action committee called Oregonians for Higher Education Excellence, but it's not often that such a concentration of powerful people piles into the same PAC at the same time.

Yesterday, Nike Chairman Phil Knight joined former University of Oregon Athletic Director Pat Kilkenny (who made a pile in insurance in California), Columbia Distributing Chairman Ed Maletis and Endeavour Capital's John von Schlegell in supporting the PAC—each contributing $65,000. Columbia Sportswear CEO Tim Boyle gave $62,500.

The PAC now has $258,000 on hand after just five donations.

Monday, May 21

History Pub: Finding David Douglas
An hour-long documentary by the Oregon Cultural Heritage Commission about the Scottish botanist David Douglas, who spent much of his career nosing around the Pacific Northwest and for whom the Douglas fir was named. There will also be a Q&A with filmmaker Lois Leonard. Kennedy School, 5736 NE 33rd Ave. Free. 7 pm.

Tuesday, May 22

Greg Rucka
Portland author/comic writer Greg Rucka (Stumptown, and the Queen and Country and Atticus Kodiak series) releases his newest novel (and the first in a new series), Alpha. I read it yesterday and it made for an enjoyable Sunday afternoon. Look out for a review in WW soon(ish). Powell's Books at Cedar Hills Crossing, 3415 SW Cedar Hills Blvd. 7 pm. Free.

Wednesday, May 23

The Epic of Gilgamesh Release Party
Portland artist Kristine 'Kinoko' Evans releases The Epic of Gilgamesh #1, a comic book retelling of The Epic of Gilgamesh. She will read from the book, talk about her research and also sign copies. Floating World Comics, 400 NW Couch St. 6 pm. Free.

Thursday, May 24

An Evening With Joe Sacco
Portland comic journalist Joe Sacco talks about war reporting through comic art. Sacco is always good value—he has a lot to say and he says it well. Mercy Corps Action Center, 28 SW 1st Ave. 7 pm. $10 general admission, $5 students.

Friday, May 25

Mayhem PIGJam
The Portland Indie Game Squad is hosting a weekend long game jam. Teams will be given a "game prompt" on Friday night, then spend the next two days and nights building it. Teams can be formed beforehand or on the night. BYO bedding if you want to camp out all weekend. Art Institute of Portland, 1122 NW Davis St. 7 pm May 25 to 8 pm May 27. RSVP here.

Saturday, May 26

Wonder Northwest
Portland "comics and pop culture expo" (how many of those do we have now?) Wonder Northwest returns for a second year. Sessions include "Star Wars Prop Collecting," "Gays in Comics," "Cosplay for Beginners," "Whedon Trivia," "Kick-ass Horror Films You've Never Heard Of," and "Kick-ass Horror Films You've Never Heard Of," plus gaming sessions, films and vendors. Crowne Plaza Portland, 1441 NE 2nd Ave. May 26-27. $8 one day, $15 both days. wondernorthwest.com.

Sunday, May 27

Geeklesque: Destroy All Humans!
Critical Hit Burlesque's latest geeky burlesque show has a "menace-to-mankind" theme: zombies, aliens... you get the idea. Bossanova Ballroom, 722 E Burnside. 9 pm. $12 advance, $15 at the door, reserved balcony seating $20 advance, $35 VIP.

The listing here are written by WW, but we crib events shamelessly from the Geek Portland calendar. Go there for more events and information.

Battleship, the gargantuan-budget sci-fi action-adventure based on a Hasbro board game and starring Taylor Kitsch and Rihanna, wasn't screened by WW's press deadlines. Why not? It's only the end of cinema as we know it. Here's a review.

WW Critics Grade: C-

Like taking a stand for Wall Street bankers, oil companies or guys who hang truck nuts from the bumpers of their SUVs, defending a movie like Battleship is almost impossible. No one will ever feel sorry for a $200 million sci-fi action flick, no matter how unfairly maligned it may be—especially if that action flick is based on a board game. Critics have long prophesized of the day Hollywood would officially run dry of original ideas, and the release of a film whose source material is a 46-year-old naval-themed variant of tic-tac-toe is as sure a sign of the cinematic apocalypse as any. It’s not just cynical journalists and bloggers recoiling at the notion, either: A few months ago, I witnessed a press-screening audience chortle derisively at the trailer. And those people applaud at the end of Rob Schneider movies.  

Clearly, Battleship was sunk before it even left the harbor. Although successful overseas, the returns for its opening weekend in America mark the movie as a historic bomb. Is that reflective of its quality? Well, yes. Battleship is generic and forgettable, a glorified Navy recruitment video full of lobotomized patriotism and loud noises in lieu of narrative. But that’s all it is. It is not the unprecedented affront to the art of cinema it was pegged as being before anyone saw a single second. If it had a different title and a more modest budget, it’d barely make a ripple in what’s been a great year for blockbusters. Instead, it’s crashing against the rocks and bursting into $200 million flames. It’s a small-minded failure magnified to epic proportions.

And for its first 45 minutes or so, Battleship actually emits a kind of dimwitted charm. It helps that star Taylor Kitsch spent five years playing a charming dimwit on television. In fact, for fans of Friday Night Lights, the opening scenes will seem like a spinoff. (Not coincidentally, the director is Peter Berg, who shepherded FNL from book to big-screen to TV.) As Alex Hooper, a listless skirt-chaser perpetually slumped over a bottle of cheap beer, Kitsch is basically Tim Riggins on a Hawaiian vacation. He’s got the same haircut, the same beaten pickup truck, the same laissez-faire demeanor. In true Riggins-like behavior, Hooper shoplifts a chicken burrito to impress a girl and gets tased by the cops for his troubles. “You’re joining me in the Navy!” demands his brother (Alexander Skarsgard). Next we see Hooper, he’s sporting a grown-in buzz-cut and competing in a Navy-sponsored soccer match against a Japanese team, narrated by a play-by-play announcer. And wait: Is that Landry Clarke making sarcastic quips on the sidelines? Why didn’t they just call this thing The Dillon Panthers vs. The Aliens?

Once those aliens crash-land off the shore of Oahu, though, and Kitsch’s dialogue turns to barking orders and coordinates, any hope of Battleship emerging as a movie with an actual heart and brain get blowed up real good. Indulging in refried Michael Bayisms, Berg swoops up, down, through and around an endless barrage of CGI explosions, the soundtrack alternating between AC/DC and what sounds like a nu-metal cover of the Emergency Broadcast System alarm. (Appropriately, the goateed, lizard-eyed extraterrestrials resemble a race of Ozzfest attendees.) Rihanna is there offering monosyllabic punctuation to the myriad ‘splosions (“Damn!” “Boom!”), as is frat pinup Brooklyn Decker, whose main objective is to run while wearing a tank top. Such pandering to US Weekly subscribers is to be expected from an overblown pop creation, but Berg somehow decided that what this cartoonish, effects-laden, blow-‘em-up alien invasion picture really needed was a dose of authenticity. In a small but substantial role, he casts a real, double-amputee Iraq war veteran. How does the movie honor this true American hero? By having him punch an alien’s teeth out. And our flag was still therrrrrrrrrre.

The beloved children's author Beverly Cleary contributed $10,000 to the Libraries Yes! Committee over the weekend. That group helped renew the levy that mostly funds the Multnomah County Library in last Tuesday's primary election. Voters approved the measure, which continues—but does not increase—the existing property tax levy.

Cleary's contribution will certainly help the group's future push for a permanent tax base. Multnomah County commissioners are likely to approve placing a permanent library taxing district on the November ballot, County Chairman Jeff Cogen told WW, based partly on the overwhelming 84 percent to 16 percent margin in the May 15 primary. 

Cleary, who turned 96 last month, grew up in Yamhill County but now lives in Carmel, Calif. Her Ramona Quimby novels left a big mark on this city—a sculpture garden in Grant Park features some of the characters from those books, and the nearby Northeast Portland elementary school formerly known as Hollyrood was renamed for Cleary in 2008.

Libraries Yes! has spent $436,000 this year, according to state filings, and has $60,000 on hand.

A newly-formed political action committee recorded two monster donations on Friday. As WW reported earlier, Columbia Sportswear CEO Tim Boyle and John von Schlegell, managing partner at Endeavour Capital formed Oregonians for Higher Education Excellence at the end of March.

Columbia Distributing Chairman Ed Maletis initially seeded the PAC with $65,000 and on Friday two wealthy Duck supporters, Boyle and former University of Oregon Athletic Director Pat Kilkenny chipped in $62,500 and $65,000 respectively. 

In an earlier interview, Boyle said the new group is interested in seeing the legislature and the Oregon University System cede autonomy more quickly to the system's seven campuses, which have seen their financial contributions from the state shrink far faster than their authority to govern themselves has grown. 

He added that the group hopes the Legislature will accomplish that devolution of authority but the PAC's money could be used to promote a ballot measure if lawmakers fail to act.