All kindsa ways to work it: Yard Dogs perform at Tour de Fat, Sat.

Saturday Aug. 19

Tour de Fat

Give back to the community by getting shit-faced and actin' a fool. As usual, all beer and T-shirt sales from this traveling bike tour benefit both the BTA and PUMP. Aside from the costumed bike parade, there'll be bike limbo, slow ride and dance competitions, not to mention the burlesque cabaret theatrics of the Yard Dogs Road Show. Meet in Tom McCall Waterfront Park, between Southwest Naito Parkway and Salmon Street. 11 am-7 pm. For more info, visit newbelgium.com. Free. Easy.

Clean Energy Fair

Having witnessed the sheer magnitude of this Spring's Earth Day celebration in Sellwood Park, it looks like this event should match, if not surpass, the former with its roster of musicians—including the finger-pickin' bluegrass of Cross-eyed Rosie—as well as over half a dozen speakers and workshops, all focused on giving the big Mama N. (not to mention our own species) a little breathin' room. Meet in Sellwood River Park, 1 SE Spokane Street and Oaks Park Way. Noon-7 pm. For more info, visit cleanenergyfair.org. Free. Easy.

ION-ic Slideshow

One thing's for sure: Judging the slides in this show will be far safer than enacting them was. Fifteen teams present 10 photos, half of which must contain some sort of windsurfing or kiteboarding, and all of which must contain the self-promoting ION logo (the event's sponsor!). We suggest giving extra points to any members snapped kite tubing in the now off-limits reservoirs of the Columbia, Willamette and Rogue River basins. Meet in the Copper Salmon Pub, 1100 E Marina Way, Hood River. 9 pm. For more info, call 541-400-9510. Free. Easy.

Sunday Aug. 20

Multnomah Stroll

By walking a mere 5k through Multnomah Village, you'll be helping Vision Northwest, a nonprofit that helps those with vision loss maintain an independent lifestyle. Meet in the Key Bank parking lot, between Southwest 35th Avenue and Troy Street, Multnomah Village. 9 am. For more info, call 245-1511. $5. Easy.

The Portland Challenge

That the number of eager participants crossing the Willamette (without the use of money, motors or bridges) has roughly doubled every year since this charitable event's '03 inception says as much for the quirky festivities planned (a tower of 20 watermelons?) as it does about our residents' growing fascination with becoming Toxic Avengers. Fear not, the U.S. Coast Guard's slated to be there, as are the live rooftop sounds of J Bird and the Magic Moments. Meet at the Goose Hollow Inn, 1927 SW Jefferson St. Noon. For more info, visit portlandchallenge.com. Free. Easy.