August 27th, 2008
“Son of a bitch, you’re running up the meter!”27 comments
August 20th, 2008
"Hey bro, remember me? You wrote that story about me in the paper."3 comments
August 13th, 2008
“It’s the Californians, man, the Californians are the worst.”15 comments
August 6th, 2008
The middle-aged man I picked up at Vendetta is in a hyperactively verbose lather ...0 comments
July 23rd, 2008
When I step into the obese old woman's apartment5 comments
July 16th, 2008
The obese old woman at Fred Meyer has a bad hip and a wheelchair...8 comments
July 9th, 2008
“...I need to take a shower first and wash all of this blood off.”6 comments
July 2nd, 2008
“So I’ve got these two women in the back of my cab who just refuse to get out...”8 comments
June 25th, 2008
“My friend’s getting divorced, and he’s really drunk,” says the bartender...8 comments
June 18th, 2008
There’s nothing like a good Friday night, and I’m referring to the money.3 comments
[August 2nd, 2006] Please. It's a good word. I won't lecture you on its use—I'm not your mother. But here are my pleas to you.
Please don't honk at me when I'm loading fares. It's not my fault that you were riding my ass so closely that you had to slam on the brakes, nor that you were so inattentive you didn't notice my flashers going on halfway down the block. Would you honk at a bus?
Please let me know you're paying with a card when you get in. I can usually start running it and have an approval number by the time we get where we're going, lessening your wait.
Please don't let a cabbie give you shit for using a card. Get his cab number and report his scamming ass—he makes us all look bad.
Please do get in and out on the curb side whenever possible.
Please don't just blithely fling the door open when you get out. You clip a car or slam a cyclist, I get in more trouble than you.
Cyclists, please get some lights. You won't find a driver more sympathetic to cyclists than I, but even I can't fucking see you at night. Surely your life is worth $9.99?
And above all: If you've been drinking, please call a cab. Would you rather ride in a refurbished cop car, or a cop car proper? It's a no-brainer. You can come back for your car in the morning. Really.
Thank you for listening.
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RECENT COMMENTS ON “Please. It's a good word.”
Please. It's a good word.So is 'thank you,' as in thank you for making me laugh, sigh, and think depending on the subject of your column.—Scott
Please. It's a good word.A note about the cabbie that would not accept credit cards.A few years ago I went to the Waterfront fireworks on Fourth of July at the Hawthorne Bridge. After the event...
Please. It's a good word.please.please stop printing this column.—not a fan
"Would you honk at a bus?"Of course they would.On a weekend, they start the night angry, and finish it drunk and angry.Love the column, keep it up! Please.—Bus driver
