[June 27th, 2007]

Welcome to GET OUT!

The following pages give you nearly 100 ways to connect with Oregon's most valuable commodity.

The Great Outdoors.

Sure, there are plenty of artsy-fartsy types here at Willamette Week, but there are just as many of us who love nothing better than to grab a six-pack and head as far away from the bright lights of the big city as possible. (Sometimes we're the same people.) In fact, people in—and out—of our office move here just for the variety of outdoor activities.

We've asked several of our nature-lovers to donate their knowledge of Oregon's most open-air environments, and a few of them even donated to our "Oregon Outdoor Commandments" (see below for the list). If Pope Benedict can hand out edicts on driving, then we here in Willamette Week-land see absolutely nothing wrong with sending out a few edicts of our own.

Happy Camping,
Byron Beck
Special Sections Editor

Oregon's Outdoor Commandments

1. Thou must pretend to like hiking, even if you hate it, because that's what you're supposed to do here in Oregon.

2. If thou packest it in, so shalt thou pack it out. Thou shalt cart a short-case and recycle the empties.

3. Thou shalt not hike without thy canine companion, yet neither shalt thou leave dog crap on the trail.

4. Thou shalt not brake with thy feet, for lo, Democratic Senator Ginny Burdick hath decreed it a sin.

5. If thou goest up, hast thou the right of way. (If thou goest down, thy MySpace friends shall multiply.)

6. Thou shalt wear thy child in a backpack, even though they are getting absolutely nothing out of this trip and would rather be home watching Teletubbies.

7. Thou shalt not covet thy neighbor's wife's Garmin GPSMAP 76CSx, nor thy neighbor's Asolos, nor thy neighbor's six-man tent.

8. Thou shalt wear jingle bells whilst tromping through bear country. And thou shalt always watch out for that asshole on the ATV (and the Oregonian reporter in hot pursuit!)

9. Six hiking socks keepest thou in thy sock drawer. But the seventh, tho' it be threadbare and hath lost its mate, still shalt thou keep it holey.

10. Thou shalt have no Idols before the New Year—so get thy nature play in now!

Camp Director

Scoutmaster/Trail Leader

Happy Campers

camp Counselors

hunter-gatherer

busy beavers

Rain Goddess

natural resources

Acknowledgments: The writers and editors of this guide are grateful for the Parks and Recreation departments of Washington and Oregon for information and ideas—you should lean on them, too; hike distances and Lewis and Clark quotes are based on the books of Oregon's incomparable outdoorsy know-it-all, William L. Sullivan.