[March 12th, 2008]

I’ve heard harrowing tales from South by Southwest, Austin’s annual music festival and conference, for as long as I’ve been involved with music writing. Tales of drunken debauchery, missed flights, industry lackeys, ringing ears, gut-bombing Mexican food, perfectly tousled hair and Iggy Pop. SXSW is like Disneyland for the music industry, it’s often said: all the thrills, all the wonder, all the artificiality.

So this year I’m finally making the trip. My bags are packed and my plans are laid (Billy Bragg and the Constantines, here I come). It’s gonna be sweet. I’d say you should come with, but that would just be insane. Non-affiliated music fans at SXSW can either wait for hours in hellish lines to see their favorite bands with the distinct possibility of never setting foot in the venue, or they can ante up $500 or more for a weekend pass ($650 is the walk-up rate, and that’s just for the music pass—entry to the fest’s interactive and film events can run you over a grand) ensuring access to most concerts. Then there’s the hotel, the flight, the food. So maybe you should stay home. After all, I’ll be blogging throughout the fest at localcut.com/category/tour-diary/sxsw2008. There you’ll be able to read, hear and see the power and the glory of America’s craziest music festival. You’ll also save yourself a grand or two. See you on the Internet.

FRIDAY MARCH 14

[sports] BULL RIDING

Cows, carnage and clowns—PDX hosts an international crew of professional bull riders for one night only. Rose Garden Arena, 1401 N Wheeler Ave., 736-2182, rosequarter.com. 8 pm. $10-$100.

SATURDAY MARCH 15

[FILM] THE PLAYER

A strong weekend of classics on the big screen—The Omega Man at the Hollywood, Dog Day Afternoon at Living Room Theater—is highlighted by Robert Altman’s savage satire of the film industry. So that’s why Tim Robbins is in town! NW Film Center. Whitsell Auditorium, 1219 SW Park Ave., 221-1156. 7 pm. $4-$7.

[everything] LIVE WIRE! ANNIVERSARY SHOW

OPB’s live radio show celebrates its fourth b-day with local travel writer Chuck Thompson, comic-book duo the Pander Brothers and local blogstress Stacy Bolt. Plus music from Amelia and the MarchFourth Marching Band. Aladdin Theater, 3116 SE 11th Ave., 234-9694. 8 pm. $15-$25.

[PROTEST] WORLD WITHOUT WAR

There’s a lot to disagree on when it comes to Iraq. But one thing most people can agree on is…we’ve had enough. It’s a day of rallies, rock concerts and a march, brought to you by PDX Peace and a host of co-sponsors. South Park Blocks, Southwest Park Avenue and Southwest Madison Street. Call 230-9427 for info. 10 am-6 pm. Free.

SUNDAY MARCH 16

[RIGHTS/MUSIC] BASIC RIGHTS OREGON BENEFIT

This is one benefit that matters: BRO is a legit gay-rights advocacy group, and the lineup features some of PDX’s best, from the sweet R&B-pop of Dirty Mittens to the spazz rock of World’s Greatest Ghosts. Get your donation on. Backspace (all ages) and Someday Lounge (21+), 115 and 125 NW 5th Ave. 7 pm. $7-$12 sliding scale.

MONDAY MARCH 17

[ST. PADDY’S DAY] K.M.R.I.A.

To those memorializing a different sort of Irishness—famine, repression, violence, mordant humor, and unrepentant drunkenness as the only sane response—local supergroup K.M.R.I.A. (Kiss My Royal Irish Arse) pays annual tribute. Crystal Ballroom, 1332 W Burnside St., 225-0047. 9 pm. $10. 21+.

TUESDAY MARCH 18

[MUSIC/WORDS] SAUL WILLIAMS

Intellectual wordplay backed by horns and infectious percussion. Aladdin Theater, 3017 SE Milwaukie Ave., 233-1994. 9 pm. $15.