[May 14th, 2008]

The results are in: Voting in Oregon’s first presidential primary to matter since—well, since before most of us were born—has given the staff here at WW a bad case of election fever. Now we’re voting on everything: who should get the best parking spaces, how Dan looks in those pants. We didn’t want the folks at home to be left out of all this democracy-in-action—especially since ballots are due next Tuesday, May 20 —so we’ve compiled a short list of events you could attend this week and voted on whether or not you should go. Sure, that’s pretty much what we do every week—but this time we’re using the word endorsements! Patriotic!

THURSDAY
Barack the Vote featuring Alan Singley & Pants Machine, Junkface, Andy Combs and the Moth

A NO vote indicates support of crusty Arizona Sen. (and veteran) John McCain and/or big-haired ex-first lady Hillary Clinton. A YES vote indicates support for handsome Illinois Sen. Barack Obama and willingness to participate in Andy Combs’ Tom Waits-influenced singalongs, following the bouncing ball on Alan Singley’s childlike pop and rocking out to Junkface. Berbati’s Pan, 213 SW Ankeny St., 248-4579. 8 pm. Sliding scale donation $5-$20. 21+.
YES

THURSDAY
Iraq Veterans Against the War Benefit: Shaky Hands, Tara Jane O’Neil and Fred Nemo, Dark Yoga, Illyas Ahmed, Aaron Montaigne, ...Worms

A YES vote looks to pair psych-hippies of all stripes with Iraq veterans, both totally unlikely and totally awesome. Voting NO requires signee to waive right to bitching or sporting “Not My President” patches or stickers. A YES vote also requires a passing familiarity with 2007 Best New Band winners the Shaky Hands, who pretty much rule. Rotture, 315 SE 3rd Ave., 234-5683. 9 pm. $5. 21+.
NO (We’re going to Barack The Vote!)

FRIDAY
Voices of A People’s History of the United States

Amends pre-existing notions of American history from 1492 to 2008 (inclusive) with primary source documents handpicked by notorious historian and activist Howard Zinn. A YES vote indicates agreement to listen to Viggo Mortensen (you may remember him from such films as A History of Violence and the Lord of the Rings trilogy) and some notable Portlanders read from the diaries, letters and speeches of great Americans. A NO vote argues that the American public school system is just fine the way it is. First Baptist Church, 909 SW 11th Ave., 222-6000. 8 pm. $10-$20.
YES

FRIDAY-SATURDAY
McMenamins 9th Annual UFO Festival

Continues local brewery chain’s yearly Willamette Valley alien love orgy; promotes theory of “crop circle as interstellar communication” to level of concrete fact. A NO vote demands that Oregonians stop dressing like little green men and parading down the streets of McMinnville. Voting YES affirms the voter’s belief that we are not alone. All festival events take place at the McMinnville Community Center, 600 NE Evans St., McMinnville. All day Friday-Saturday. $10 per event. Visit ufofest.com for more info.
NO

SATURDAY
Reach the Beach Bike Ride

A YES vote fulfills New Year’s resolution to “get off your ass every once in a while.” Money raised (by the cyclist and cyclist’s friends and co-workers) benefits the American Lung Association of Oregon. The 100-mile bike trip features 10 designated snack stops and dozens of unfortunate DayGlo Spandex outfits. A NO vote delays action on Jan. 1 resolution until further notice. Visit rtb.kintera.org or call 459-4508 for details. Portland ride kicks off at 7 am at Scholls Heights Elementary, 16400 SW Loon Drive, Beaverton. Riders: $45 fee plus a minimum of $50 in fundraising.
MAYBE?

^HEADOUT PICKS

WEDNESDAY MAY 14

[PHOTOGRAPHY] ROGER BALLEN

The celebrated South Africa-based shooter presents a handful of new creepy-gorgeous black-and-whites centered on stark situations that may or may not exist only in his own mind. Quality Pictures, 916 NW Hoyt St., 227-5060. Open 11 am-6 pm Tuesday-Saturday. Show closes June 28. Free.

FRIDAY MAY 16

[MUSIC] THE POSIES, THE NICE BOYS, BLUE SKIES FOR BLACK HEARTS, LE CONCORDE

The Posies—that sappy, infectious Seattle pop oufit from all the way back in the ’80s—is on a 20-year reunion tour. And PDX is one of a handful of cities that gets to experience the “full band” version. Show ’em some love. Dante’s, 1 SW 3rd Ave., 226-6630. 9 pm. $10. 21+.

[QUEER] STRUT

Local designer Jonny Shultz has pulled together the city’s top fashion hotties—Adam Arnold, Sofada, Magali Corzo, Idom, Popina Swim, Amai Unmei, and Under U 4 Men—for a runway show in support of Basic Rights Oregon. Fierce? Yes. Hot tranny messes? Hopefully. Wonder Ballroom, 128 NE Russell St., 224-4400. $12-$75. 8 pm. 21+.

[SCREEN] POW FEST!

Every night is ladies’ night at the Hollywood Theatre this week, with this celebration of female filmmaking. Hollywood Theatre, 4122 NE Sandy Blvd., 267-1126. 7 pm. $7 or $100 for full festival pass. See preview here.

SATURDAY MAY 17

[MUSIC] QUASI, TYPHOON, REPORTER

With smart (and often smartass) frontman Sam Coomes at the keys and Jicks Janet Weiss and Joanna Bolme on rhythm, you really can’t go wrong with Quasi. Hawthorne Theatre, 3862 SE Hawthorne Blvd., 233-7100. 9 pm. $10 advance, $12 day of show. All ages. Quasi also plays Saturday at Live Wire!

MONDAY MAY 19

[SCREEN] FEAR AND LOATHING IN LAS VEGAS

So now, less than five years later, you can go up on a steep hill in Las Vegas and look west, and with the right kind of eyes you can almost see the high-water mark—that place where the wave finally broke and rolled back. Broadway Metroplex, 1000 SW Broadway, 243-1404. 7:30 pm. $5.

TUESDAY MAY 20

[MUSIC] EL-P, DIZZEE RASCAL

Def Jux label head MC El-P is the pick of today’s hyperliterate litter, channeling political discontent into fiery if clunky flows and productions as filthy as a Blade Runner streetscape. Berbati’s Pan, 231 SW Ankeny St., 248-4579. 9:30 pm. $20. 21+.