[May 21st, 2008]

WINNERS

1 An estimated 75,000 people showing up for Sen. Barack Obama’ s Waterfront Park rally Sunday? Nobody here is trading in their cynical-scribe credentials to parrot the “new political paradigm.” But…wow! If that gathering incorporated, the rally-goers would form the seventh-largest city in Oregon—call it Obamaville (go to Murmurs for more on the rally’s photos and wweek.com for election-night coverage).

2 Gay and lesbian couples no longer must bear cross-country flights to Massachusetts if they want more recognition than “domestic partnership” status in Oregon. The California Supreme Court last week legalized same-sex marriage, making us think Mr. Rogers was oh-so-right when he warbled, “I’ve always wanted to have a neighbor just like you.”

3 Vengeful fishermen and gun nuts are off the hook, after necropsies revealed that six trapped sea lions recently found dead near Bonneville Dam died of blubber-related heatstroke, not execution-style gunshots as first reported.

LOSERS

1 Although results from the 5th Congressional District’s U.S. Republican primary came in after press time (reminder No. 2 to check wweek.com for election coverage), candidate Mike Erickson is definitely a loser. The Trib’s report about a woman saying the anit-abortion Erickson impregnated her and paid for an abortion in 2000 either destroyed Erickson’s chances among primary voters, or left him as damaged goods heading into a general election after his unconvincing explanation.

2 All 13 people who have managed to connect to Portland’s spotty free wi-fi service will soon be forced to steal a signal from their neighbors, like everybody else. Last week the public network’s operator, MetroFi, said it would pull the plug in June—unless the city, or a private buyer, took over. Magic beans, dirt cheap.

3 Multnomah County Sheriff Bernie Giusto returns to this familiar column haunt after a police-policy committee recommended yanking his badge for lying to superiors about his affair with the wife of former Gov. Neil Goldschmidt. Now Giusto says he may back off his promise to step down by the end of the year and stay to fight for his badge.

4 The Oregon Youth Authority, the state’s juvie-crime agency, has been shamed again. According to documents obtained by The O, former RiverBend youth detention center warden Darrin Humphreys allegedly stole building materials, used inmates to renovate his home, embezzled $12,400 and threatened potential whistleblowers. The current OYA director called Humphreys “sociopathic.” Too bad it took years for anyone to notice.