Inbox

[August 20th, 2008]

Rape card isn’t in our deck

Hey there, Willy Weeksters. As always, we appreciate your informative write-ups of our dangerously talented rap group. However, Joe Watts has taken things one step too far in spreading false propaganda regarding our lyrical content [Music Listings, WW, Aug. 13, 2008]. We have never “rapped about raping women” in a sense that encourages the act of rape. Yes, we have discussed rape in the third-person Tori Amos sense of the word, but we ourselves are not advocates of unwanted sex. Watts may have misunderstood the lyrics of “Poach Yo Eggs,” a song about theft, or “Come Kiss Uncle Scrotar,” a love ballad, but the lyrics “I don’t rape/ just kill” from our most popular song (“Soundproof Van”) are pretty specific.

Wombstretcha encourages misogyny, theft, child abduction, arson, animal torture, cough syrup abuse, elderly neglect, and laughing at the handicapped. However, we have, and never will, encourage(d) rape or racism. Since race is obviously a touchy issue at the Willamette White, it is predictable that the lefty-trying-to-fuck-the-chick-two-desks-down would go for the rape card. We accept your apology for misprinting our lyrical content, and we thank you for printing our response. After all, you were asking for it and we’ve had just a little too much to drink.

Womb and Ray
Wombstretcha

More ways to live cheap

Being someone who has just moved up here from out of state, I thought “How to Live Cheap in Portland” [Aug. 13, 2008] was great. Aside from a few intended chuckles, it gave me some good insight on aspects of Portland living. It may not cure my immediate problems altogether, but it fascinated me nonetheless (I especially liked reading about the sperm donations, though I cannot participate being the tobacco loving homo that I am).

My own personal advice, don’t knowingly be stupid about money. I know that this concept sounds simplistic, but sometimes it really isn’t. I’m so completely brain dead on how to keep good record of my finances that I had to break down to my sister to where she is now holding my hand through it all.

Tips: Don’t move out of state without a job secured, don’t write bad checks for a beer fix and DON’T get dragged down by the bog of payday loans. And most importantly, don’t take after my example. I am the idiot of ALL money-spenders!

“Clayton H.”
via wweek.com

Hit up [Northeast Portland’s] Voodoo Donuts around their closing time (3 am) and you can score a gigantic bucket full of donuts for hella cheap. I payed $1.50 for close to 50 donuts. Breakfast for a week!

“Dipset”
via wweek.com