Fun!
You wouldn't know it to read my sodden scribblings in these
benighted pages, but Your Humble Narrator is, in fact, aware
that Oregon licenses premises at a number of quaint &
picturesque locations beyond the Doomtown city line. With
the end of summer fast approaching, I decided it was time
to avail myself of the Pacific Wonderland's far-flung drinky
delights.
I called up my old ally/nemesis Ann R., who scribes
for a dilettantish Seattle-based publication. Like everyone
from that northern sinpot, Ann will do most anything for
money or kicks, so she snapped up the opportunity to serve
as my designated driver (wouldn't want to be irresponsible!)
during an anthropological voyage to the Oregon Coast.
We headed for Cannon Beach. This well-known Oregon treasure
hides a few landmarks of lesser fame. First off, there's
Bill's Tavern (est. 1932), which stuns even diehard
patrons with the sweetest onion rings north of Tillamook
and south of Astoria. (I hear they put brown sugar in their
batter.) The place also brews Curiously Strong Ale for Portland's
Snake and Weasel. As I soon found out, it only takes a few
of these to knock you on your ass. Trust me.
I woke the next morning in a tent at Barview State Campground
with a cooler next to next me--full of ice-cold beer! I
made a mental note to give Ann some free creative-writing
lessons as a reward. Another day had begun.
Our first stop was the Ghosthole in Garibaldi. Named
after a local fishing spot at which strange sightings are
frequent, this place had the friendly ambience of Cheers
but the decor of a Casper cartoon. The proprietors, Earl
and Becky, were happy to have us throw a few back while
we shot a game of pool. Even the locals didn't seem to mind
our presence. They were all so friendly. Maybe too friendly.
The early-morning alcohol buzz had me confused. Luckily,
Ann led me to the car, where I took her advice and slept
a little more.
I woke up in Tillamook at the intersection of Route 101
and Route 6. I rubbed my eyes; right in front of me was
the Rendezvous Lounge. Inside, sweaty, overworked
men exhaled enough secondhand smoke to kill a bull elephant.
But as nearly everybody else was deeply engrossed in a mean
game of Keno, no one seemed to care, myself included. Personally,
I was too caught up in the epic grandeur of the large stained-glass
tree frog above the bar. Finally, everything I loved as
a child--gambling, smoking, toads--all in one place!
Keeping score, I saw the Pacific Ocean, visited more than
my fair share of OLCC-blessed establishments, drank lots
of beer, went camping for the first time and did it all
in under two days.
Wham, bam, thank you ma'am! Now that's my kind of vacation.
OREGON: TOUCH IT, TASTE IT
Bill's Tavern
188 N Hemlock St., Cannon Beach
(503) 436-2202
The Rendezvous Lounge
214 Pacific Ave., Tillamook
(503) 842-5453
The Ghosthole
409 Garibaldi Ave., Garibaldi
(503) 322-2733
IT'S COMEDY TIME!
For God's sake, try to control yourself!
Harvey's Comedy Club
436 NW 6th Ave.,
241-0338
8 pm Wednesday, Thursday and Sunday;
8 and 10:30 pm Friday; 6:30, 9 and 11:30 pm Saturday, Sept.
13-17
$8-$10
ComedySportz
Competitive all-ages improv--almost as fun as fighting
with knives!
1963 NW Kearney St., 236-8888
9 pm Friday, 7:30 and 9:30 pm Saturday,
Sept. 15-16
$10, $9 with can of food for Oregon Food Bank
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