CONTENTS The Gift of Thrift Entertainment Gadgets Gear Garden Style Interiors Practical Kids Kitchen Food and Drink Body

BY SUSAN WICKSTROM Puppy Love A decidedly non-cat person (he'll get his due) celebrates Portland canines in Cat Spelled Backwards Doesn't Spell God: The Dogs of Portland ($14.95, Broadway Books, 1714 NE Broadway, 284-1726). Published by author Jeff Selis' employer, the Wieden & Kennedy advertising agency, this book is a collection of photographs and stories that pay homage to man's best friend in the Rose City and beyond. The author will donate a part of the book's proceeds to the Oregon Humane Society. For more information, visit the book's Web site, www.dogsofportland.com. Christmas on the Rocks Holidays on Ice by David Sedaris ($8, Little, Brown and Co., Annie Bloom's Books, 7834 SW Capitol Highway, 246-0053) may well be the most hilarious book about the jolly season ever written. Sedaris, a dramatist, author of essay collections Barrel Fever and Naked and all-around funny guy, delighted National Public Radio audiences with his "SantaLand Diaries" readings a few years ago. Those pieces, which described his harrowing and hysterical experience working as an elf for a department store Kris Kringle, are included in Holidays on Ice along with several other tales of dubious seasonal cheer. This book is a very appropriate present for people who suffer from the Christmas blues; they'll be crying with laughter in no time. Smooth Sailing Every year, one book emerges as the perfect all-around gift for story lovers. The raves have already been launched for National Book Award winner Andrea Barrett's fifth novel, The Voyage of the Narwhal ($24.95, Norton, Looking Glass Bookstore, 318 SW Taylor St., 227-4760), the Cold Mountain of this season. Barrett's gift for relating historical fact to the human condition is obvious in this story of an ill-fated Arctic expedition in search of Sir John Franklin's lost crew; protagonist Erasmus Darwin Wells accompanies his charismatic future brother-in-law on the daring voyage in a sad effort to find meaning in his life. Barrett's story begins as a meticulously documented travelogue but soon gives way to a dramatic and breathtaking tale of the high seas. Reader or Not Books are no-brainer gifts for those who love to read. Here's a book that actually celebrates literary passion: Ex Libris: Confessions of a Common Reader by Anne Fadiman ($16, Farrar, Straus and Giroux, Twenty-Third Avenue Books, 1015 NW 23rd Ave., 224-5097). Fadiman, editor of The American Scholar journal and author of the award-winning book The Spirit Catches You and You Fall Down, takes an intelligent and entertaining look at her addiction to books. Her essays chronicle her lifelong obsession, from using her father's 22-volume Trollope set as blocks when she was four to uniting her book collection with her husband's as a true mark of their lifelong commitment to each other. This slim publication is a sweet find for any bibliophile. Couch Camping Nearly everyone has one: an itinerant friend or relative who enjoys camping out on your couch. Help these deadbeats out with The Sofa Surfing Handbook: A Guide for Modern Nomads ($11.95, Manic D Press, Powell's Travel Store, 701 SW 6th Ave., 228-1108). This handy little book offers advice on roadtripping, housesitting, hygiene, hanging out, meaningless employment and other aspects associated with the fine art of slacking. The Sofa Surfing Handbook is edited by San Francisco Spoken Word diva Juliette Torrez; most of the text is written by fellow or former slacker artists. Model Behavior When Barbie first emerged from the plastic mold nearly 40 years ago, she was ostensibly employed as a model. Since then she has worked as a teacher, doctor, bride and Baywatch lifeguard, among other things. But Barbie remains a fashion animal at heart, and a new book celebrates her mannequin-like figure. Barbie Millicent Roberts: An Original ($30, Pantheon Books, Borders, 708 SW 3rd Ave., 220-5911) is a collection of artful photographs that showcase the young Barbie and, more importantly, her outfits. With ensembles that paid homage to such designers as Chanel and Christian Dior, early Barb had a wardrobe to die for. This book is a necessary addition to any Barbie collector's cache of Mattel goods. Direct Line to God The recent glut of spiritually leaning books on the market is disheartening to many. Must we really gain inspiration from unqualified people out to gain a buck, people who don't even write that well? It was only a matter of time before someone took advantage of this phenomenon and wrote a parody of spirituality books. Heaven Talks Back: An Uncommon Conversation by Jon Macks ($12.95, Simon & Schuster, Borders­Tigard, 16920 SW 72nd Ave., 968-7576) is an irreverent chronicle of one man's conversation with God during the course of a year. In this case, it helps that the man is also a writer for The Tonight Show who describes the supreme deity as a "know-it-all." Though this collection isn't exactly the most hip thing to come down the gift-book pike this year, Macks' humor will appeal to the curmudgeon on any list. Grrrls Just Wanna Have Fun Tomato Rodriguez is the name of the lesbian biker-chick star of Flaming Iguanas: An Illustrated All-Girl Road Novel Thing by Erika Lopez ($11, Simon & Schuster, Powell's, 1005 W Burnside St., 228-4651). This cult favorite of last year, now available in paperback, is an illustrated story of a very wild road trip that begins, "Magdalena and I are gonna cross America on two motorcycles. We're gonna be so fucking cool, mirrors and windows will break when we pass by." Flaming Iguanas will appeal to the butch biker chick on anyone's list, as well as those who simply want to know more about this subculture. Lopez is author of Lap Dancing for Mommy and They Call Me Mad Dog!, a brand-new sequel to Flaming Iguanas. Bookie Nights Many people consider the short story to be the best literary genre because it lends itself so well to lunch break and bedtime reading. Fortunately, one of the finest contemporary short-story writers working today has a new collection out. Lorrie Moore's Birds of America ($23, Knopf, Powell's on Hawthorne, 3747 SE Hawthorne Blvd., 238-1668) showcases the author's wit, love of language and clever grasp of modern life. This brilliant collection is so perfect it even has a few Christmastime stories for a complete dose of holiday cheer. - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - Willamette Week | originally published December 9, 1998