CONTENTS Battle of the Box Sets Entertainment Gadgets Gear Style Interiors Furniture Kids Books Revel in Relics Kitchen Food and Drink Body Frivolous

BY TINA SATTER Spa, Spa, Spa... This is the one for you, or the one you demand others lavish on you--a gift certificate for InsideOut, Nature's Salon and Day Spa for Men & Women (Nature's Northwest, 17711 Jean Road, Lake Oswego, 635-9615). Merely entering the luscious grocery store with its precious veggies and cakes may put you in a Zen state, but true nirvana awaits upstairs. Indulge in unusual treatments such as an underwater massage, a pineapple-papaya facial or a sea-plant body wrap in this swanky yet accessible joint. Several spa packages are designed specifically for the gents, and prices range from $130 to $225 for the "Time Out" special, which includes lunch. The "Friends" option is designed for two, and the tailor-made "Salad Bar" package lets you pick and choose services. I'm Happy Again Zut alors! With French flair straight out of The Umbrellas of Cherbourg, Georges Gaspar umbrellas ($150-$170, Jane's Vanity, 521 SW Broadway, 241-3860) range from whimsical to dapperly masculine. The Gaspar model bucks traditional dome style in favor of a pagoda-shaped canopy that will make you ache for rain. The rich tones of the completely waterproof Mylar and antique handles make these a worthwhile gift if only to decorate a bumbershoot stand. Created in a Parisian parasol workshop, these 'brellas are the epitome of luxury. Lined models are also available for keeping those unseemly ribs hidden from view. Forget the Seine--stroll the Willamette in style. Take It Like a Man With smooth skin, perfect posture and a "ready for a round whenever you are" attitude, all this burly rubber man requires is four AA batteries. The SlamMan ($299, Sharper Image, 700 SW 5th Ave., Pioneer Place, 228-4110) makes it unnecessary to slog to the gym for a full boxing workout. SlamMan has eight targets that light up, telling you when and where to punch according to his 15 programmed workouts. Developed by professional boxers and endorsed by Sugar Ray Leonard, SlamMan provides aerobic conditioning, muscle toning and increased reaction time. He is also considerably more hands-on in the stress-reduction department than a couch-therapy session. A built-in sensor adjusts for lighter or harder punches, and SlamMan comes with gym-quality gloves and an instructional boxing video. Most importantly, he won't punch (or bite) back. Fill 'em Up Sherwood-based Vista Balloon Adventures Inc. (625-7385) provides hot-air balloon rides over Oregon wine country between April 1 and Oct. 31. One to 36 people can hop in the basket and, weather permitting, cruise 3,000 feet above the pride of Oregon: vineyards, rivers, trees and farms. A gift certificate for two costs $360 (payment plans are available) and can be mailed overnight to the lucky recipients, who will receive a wooden wine box holding their personalized certificate, two champagne glasses and a seven-minute video providing an enticing preview of the ride to come. The day begins at dawn in Newberg with the assembly and inflation of the balloon. After the one-hour flight, the pair is transported (via car this time) from the landing spot to the launch site for a catered, celebratory champagne lunch. Off the Cuff Keep whoever or whatever is near and dear to your heart even closer during the holidays with Be Mine handcuffs ($252.95, Spartacus, 302 SW 12th Ave., 224-2604). The cuffs are far from standard cop issue: They feature a sparkly yellow and black bumblebee on one cuff that matches the rhinestone-laden word "Mine" on the other. Used among the gaming sort, they're sure to provide arresting romance for a lover or to inform crushes they can't get away so easily. Not So Frivolous After All If you were to own the most comfy and durable pair of custom-crafted shoes ever, where would they come from? How about a family named Shoemaker that has been cobbling away in Scappoose for over 75 years? Too perfect? Let some lucky tootsies decide when they step into a pair of West Coast Shoe Company's custom-fit Romeos ($205, West Coast Shoe Company, 52828 NW Shoe Factory Lane, Scappoose, 800-326-2711). Combining the support of a boot with the comfort of a slipper, Romeos are crafted to accommodate an individual's podiatric preferences. What do they look like? Think Clint Eastwood in a shearling vest. Call to receive a catalog and custom-fit form. She Loves Me, She Loves Me Not Sending a dozen roses as either an apology or an expression of love is trite. All the act really denotes is a lack of creativity and effort. Skip the bouquet and show her how much you care by springing for a petal-filled dress by Rojas ($92, Pokerface, 128 SW 3rd Ave., 294-0445). A bunch of red roses quickly becomes shriveled and black, but these petals are meant to last. The simple camisole-style sheath contains visible dried rose petals at the bust line and the bottom hem--between the nylon lining and outer lacy material. The rose petals move with the knee-length dress to create a wonderful rustling whisper. This fitted frock is available in black and deep burgundy. One has to get fairly close to see the petals, but maybe that's the plan. Rock On As we rocket toward the 21st century amid the cacophony of our times (moaning interns, greedy sports stars), we could all stand to chill out a bit. Large crystal clusters ($45-$400, Esther's Treasures, 3409 SE Belmont St., 231-7628) infuse home, office or car with soothing energy, positive vibes and natural aesthetic enhancement. Tibetan monks are still the caretakers of the supply in Nepal, and the smoky brown quartz has long been believed to be a channel linking Westerners with the spiritual hotbed of the ancient East. It is said to contain om, that elusive point of absolute connectedness. The royal-looking amethyst geode is perfect for that cranky female on your list: Amethyst was considered the highest female stone among Native American medicine women, who felt it had the power to transform negative energy into positive energy. On the subject of true sanctity, the Greeks, Romans and Egyptians believed the presence of amethyst could prevent drunkenness. Get Lit Light somebody's holiday fire with a Vincent van Gogh pipe ($295, Rich's Cigar Store, 820 SW Alder St., 228-1700), inspired by his paintings and drawings of pipes and pipe smokers. Crafted in Italy, the Picta collection features 16 pipes that pay homage to Old One Ear himself. Many of van Gogh's paintings with pipes were self-portraits. The Picta 09 pipe is extracted from Self-Portrait with Straw Hat and Pipe. Smokers with a more humble bent may yearn for the rustic Picta 04, taken from the painting Farmer's Head with Terracotta Pipe. Objets d'art themselves, these tributes will appeal to van Gogh groupies and pipe smokers alike. - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - Willamette Week | originally published December 2, 1998