Remember watching Ally Sheedy's quirky character construct
a Cap'n Crunch and sugar sandwich in The Breakfast Club?
Most of us prefer our cereal with milk in a bowl, but almost
all of us have a bizarre favorite food. And why shouldn't
we? Every once in a while we want to forget the barrage of
nutrition advice, ignore the fancy-schmancy Martha Stewart
recipes and say, "To hell with it! I'm eating whatever I damn
well please!"
Here, Portlanders reveal their secret sinful indulgences.
Chances are the list contains a few peculiar treats you
haven't tried--at least, not yet.
* Serena Cruz, county commissioner: "I started eating
whole lemons with salt and salsa and chocolate yogurt staying
up all night in grad school on the East Coast. They sell
Stoneyfield Farms chocolate yogurt in the East, and I used
to buy it by the tub."
* Gayle Jolley, chef and director of In Good Taste cooking
school: "I never buy them, but when I go over
to friends' houses for dinner, I eat the Kraft Singles cheese
slices for their kids' lunches right out of the refrigerator."
* Bob Foote, president of the Hood to Coast relay race:
"Everyone around me thinks they stink, but I like canned
sardines."
* Mike Thrasher, rock-show promoter: "My stepdad
gave me a recipe for pizza omelettes in a book of recipes
one year. It was something he stumbled across. You cut up
leftover pizza, fry it in butter and then add it to an omelette
with cheese."
* Brian Berg, 44 Long singer-songwriter: "Even if
you think that you don't have anything in the house to eat,
you do. One day I was hungry and only had a few ingredients,
so I topped wheat crackers with sweet-hot mustard, cranberry
sauce and smoked oysters. I've bought those ingredients
just to make it again a few times since."
* Dawn Avagliano, Panties and Thunderwear singer-songwriter:
"Sometimes I eat leftover, reheated McDonald's hamburgers
and fries for breakfast. My friends think it's disgusting,
but I can't throw anything out--and it really doesn't taste
bad."
* Robert Sullivan, author of The Meadowlands:
"I would never make them myself, but I used to get tuna
fish and egg salad sandwiches on
buttered rye bread at the Short Hills Deli in New Jersey."
* Bill Humdert and the firefighters at Portland's Station
No.1: "Sometimes we'll make a dish we call '50,000 cubic
feet of methane.' You take leftover corned beef, cabbage
and broth, then add two or three cans of hot chili. This
guy who cooks it on our shift adds jalapeños. Don't
get too close to an open flame after eating it."
* Mike Jones, president of NAIL Distribution: "I
eat those baby teething cookies sometimes, since we have
them around the house for our twin baby boys."
* Jack Cain, Portland Rockies owner: "I eat a lot
of baby dill pickles and cheese. Once I couldn't find a
pacifier for my grandson when he was a baby, so I just stuck
a pickle in there. I figured if I liked them that much,
then he should, too."
* Ginny Burdick, state senator: "I never eat them
anymore, but when I was in graduate school and on a strict
budget, I ate sliced Twinkies topped with boysenberry yogurt.
I still eat the yogurt, but not the Twinkies. When I lived
in Port Angeles, Wash., I was a reporter living under the
poverty level, and I ate bologna sandwiches on Wonder bread
with mustard and mayonnaise for an entire month."
* Anne-Marie DiStefano, Clinton Street Theater owner:
"Beer and chocolate go really well together, and I think
that Raisinets and Red Hook go especially well together.
I usually have them when I'm watching a movie, but sometimes
just when I go home from work, too."
* Nadine Steklenski, Nike apparel designer: "There
was about a year where I made everything out of Bisquick,
including Bisquick taco casserole. I was working on a sculpture
project of found objects, and I was going through the garbage
and found a book called 100 Ways to Cook with Bisquick.
I went to Costco and bought a huge quantity of Bisquick
and started cooking. The only other thing I really ate that
year was Steak-ums stir fry."
* Luke Dolkas, artist and Portland State University
student: "As a kid, I loved glazed doughnuts, and I
loved mint-chip ice cream.
I still eat it, but only on special birthdays."
* Amy Grigsby, Goose Hollow Inn bartender: "When
I was little, my mom and I used to eat lettuce, mayonnaise
and peanut butter sandwiches, and I think her mom did, too.
We also ate minced black-olive sandwiches with mayonnaise
and Dijon on little dainty bread. I still eat them sometimes."
* Jon Meyers, Daily Grind cashier: "I was living
in Santa Cruz, andoutside of Pizza My Heart somebody suggested
I put ice cream on the pepperoni pizza I had just bought.
It was delicious. I'm very health-conscious now, but in
an indulgent moment, it's the best."
* Jennifer Carlson, Pastaworks employee: "On Saturdays,
my dad would take care of us. He was such a Saturday dad
that he didn't know what to feed us, so I ended up eating
peanut butter and bologna sandwiches."
* Emily Grigsby, seventh grader at Fernwood Middle School:
"Once I accidentally got some honey on a slice of pizza
on my plate, and it tasted really good, so I've done it
again since then."
* Kelli Vergotis, Vergotis dress-shop owner and tailor:
"Weird? You mean like fried chicken livers on toast
or cottage cheese on potato chips? I eat both of those."
* Arlene Schnitzer, arts benefactor and philanthropist:
"I eat butter on a lot of foods that people don't usually
put butter on, like radishes and chocolate cake. I also
like raw, whole salted potatoes."
* Jennifer Beck, nutritionist: "I was trying to
make something my kids would like, and they loved the hobo
quesadilla--a tortilla, cheese, salsa and bacon chunks.
If it's good for them, it's good for me."
* Thomas Bruner, Cascade AIDS Project executive director:
"The only quirky thing I like is fried chicken smothered
in ketchup. Sometimes there's more ketchup on the plate
than fried chicken. I won't eat it in public because I don't
want to look geeky, and it splatters all over your shirt
and tie."
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Willamette Week | originally
published May 19, 1999
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