Dear Suey,
What do you think about Ross Jeffries' Speed Seduction seminar
and other programs that promise to teach a guy how to get
women in bed? After three years without a date, I'm getting
desperate--I'll try anything. I've read some of the literature
and it doesn't seem half bad. But I want a woman's opinion--do
these techniques really work and are they worth the trouble?
I wouldn't mind an easy lay here and there, but what I'm
really looking for is something long-term. It seems like women
who spot what you're doing will be even more turned off than
before.
--On the Prowl
Dear Ross Jeffries, author of the Speed Seduction trademark,
and fans thereof,
Have you ever watched a woman's eyes
glaze over with a mixture of disdain and bored confusion?
Have you ever listened to someone struggle to use the word
"penetrate" three times in the same sentence? Have you ever
noticed that "below me" is a fairly lame pun for "blow me"?
Speed Seduction and others like it are based on Neuro-Linguistic
Programming, a set of communication and suggestion techniques
previously used mostly for getting a raise out of your boss.
The theory goes that if you repeat what the other person says
(to establish rapport), ask enough questions and use enough
puns, you can get just about anything you want from your employer/lover/mom/insurance
agent.
I'm sure some potential dates will be mesmerized by the speech
patterns and weird sexual references Mr. Jeffries recommends,
especially if he or she has had plenty to drink. At some point,
we have all found ourselves undeniably attracted to infomercial
voiceovers, sales people, and men who turn every conversation
into an oblique quiz about one's innermost Harlequin desires.
I suspect that if you're looking to get laid, and your lunch
date is looking to get laid, these techniques will allow you
to establish the sympatico state that lets you both get laid.
This is by no means a poor outcome. However, in the name
of good taste, I beg you to reconsider. As you have astutely
inferred, once your martini friend finds out you've been following
a script (somewhere between five minutes and a week), your
conquest will probably feel manipulated, duped and/or pissed--people
are easily offended that way. And you'll probably be glad
to see last night's love of your life walk out that door,
since you'll never know whether your hit was interested in
you or the sales tactic.
Maybe that's why "get-laid-quick" schemes put the emphasis
on speedy conquest and instant dumping over the slow process
of real intimacy--once you adopt full-scale the tactics of
a user, it's difficult not to see others as users too.
That said, it doesn't hurt to read up. The books usually
throw in a few confidence-building pep talks (they must work--real
poise is required to deliver some of those one-liners). And
if it so happens that the pumped-up, hyper-aggressive language
also keeps seminar attendees from falling asleep in their
folding chairs, so be it. Furthermore, some guys (and gals)
could probably use a few tips on better listening and flirting
habits (improved grooming is usually covered also). And who
knows? The book might work as a sexy conversation starter;
once Clinton goes out of office, we'll need more of these.
While you're at the library, I recommend you also get the
chick's POV from real-live babes; look to expand your knowledge
of women's literature (and pickup expertise) with a few articles
by Susie Bright, Sallie Tisdale and the writers of Bust.
See a few movies, listen to music...you'll be able to work
this into conversations later. The authors of your favorite
pick-up books are right about one thing: Your whole life is
excellent fodder for erotically charged mood-setting and your
next first move.
--Suey
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-Suey
hears from the virgins |
| 5/17/00 |
|
-What
do you think about Ross Jeffries' Speed Seduction seminar
and other programs that promise to teach a guy how to
get women in bed? |
| 5/24/00 |
|
-I've recently started paling around (and more) with a married guy; now it's getting weird. |
|
