OMG! Johnny finally invited me to PDX Zombie Prom: Enchantment Under the Dead Sea this weekend. I can't wait to shamble out of the hearse and dance the night away to Writhe in Agony's take on prom favorites and Toxic Zombie's rock. If emcee Baron Von Goolo could sign my death certificate I'd be so totes excited! Johnny even said we'd go out to dinner at an Italian joint where we can eat real Italians!
But since it's May, I'm not so sure where to get the accessories to be the most gorgeous ghoul at the prom. No matter. Whether it's Halloween, Day of the Dead, Zombie Jesus Day (LOL, I mean Easter) or just another Sunday bloody Sunday, there are shops everywhere where I can glam up to get down, and I don't even need to besiege Lloyd Center to get the goods.
Dressed to Kill
Portland's got thrift stores aplenty, but any self-respecting zed-head knows some places wash and delouse their wears before selling. That's what makes The Bins (a.k.a. the Goodwill Outlet, 1740 SE Ochoco St., 230-2076) the best place to dress a festering frame. An endless sea of unsorted outfits awaits, and the musty smell of death left behind by a former owner is free of cost.
Out on a Limb
A sumptuous feast of hipsters awaits Portland zombies on the weekend, but sometimes snacks become necessary. The Lippman Co. (50 SE Yamhill St., 239-7007, lippmancompany.com) offers a Dahmer's fridge worth of rubber limbs, including feet, hands, legs and arms covered in gore. As an added bonus, Lippman's is stocked with makeup, blood and rubber bugs to spruce up the decomposition process.
Lady in Red
When you chew on the internal organs of humans, things are bound to get messy. Any ghoul who's any ghoul knows the best accessory for a night of shambling romance is a glorious smattering of the red stuff. Look no further than Bazaar of the Bizarre (7202 NE Glisan St., Suite A, 235-3552) for blood by the tube, capsule or liter.
Make Up and Make Out
Rotten flesh isn't easy to come by, especially for the freshly dead. I mean, Samantha's flesh is totally more decomposed than mine! Hollywood Costumers (635 SE Hawthorne Blvd., 235-9215) is like the Macy's of creature makeup, with every color of the deceased spectrum to color that face dead—and spirit gum to add scars and gaping wounds with ease.
THURSDAY MAY 14
The work of 96-year-old painter Mary Henry is as visually stunning as it was in the '60s.
FRIDAY MAY 15
Local all-ages haven the Artistery is one of the best places in town to see your favorite bands sweat it out basement style, and tonight's show is a fundraiser to get the house new sound equipment. Dance for a good cause!
[STAGE] TELLING: PORTLAND, OR
Drawn from interviews with 21 military veterans and their families and performed by eight of those same vets, Telling seeks to convey the experience of warfare and the difficulties of readjustment to civilian life—through theater. First Congregational Church, 1126 SW Park Ave., thetellingproject.org. 8 pm Friday-Saturday, 2 pm Sunday, May 15-17. Free.
[VARIETY] CABARET BORIS NATASHA
The bizarre variety show returns with dance, live music and moves from the Boris Natasha dancers—Metro prez David Bragdon, Peter Ames Carlin, sculptor James Harrison and Deputy Secretary of State Barry Pack. PerformanceWorks NW, 4625 SE 67th Ave., 777-1907. 8 pm Friday-Saturday May 15-16. $10-$15. Advance tickets at brownpapertickets.com.
SATURDAY MAY 16
It's roller derby carnage! Portland's Guns N' Rollers take on the Break Neck Betties.
[MUSIC] TENDER LOVING EMPIRE BIRTHDAY PARTY
Best birthday party ever! Seven of our favorite local bands (including Jared Mees the Grown Children and World's Greatest Ghosts) play on the same stage. Plus, Mees promises balloons, confetti and, hopefully, birthday cake. Backspace, 115 NW 5th Ave., 248-2900. 7 pm. $8. All ages.
SUNDAY MAY 17
Pixies singer and legendary songwriter Frank Black helps the kids at the School of Rock belt their hearts out.
[FESTIVAL] ALBERTA ART HOP
Seventeen blocks of art, food and live music—absolutely free. Northeast Alberta Street from 12th to 30th avenues. 11 am-6 pm Saturday, May 16. Info at artonalberta.org.