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October 21st, 2009 KELLY CLARKE | Headout
 

Rack ’Em Up

Portland fights breast cancer, abuse and the Wicked Witch of the West with bare chests.

     
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Mona Superhero’s A Little Voice Inside My Head Said Don’t Look Back

Other towns celebrate Breast Cancer Awareness Month with a run/walk or a charity dinner. Not Portland. Bless our pervy little hearts, we’ve got a full-on, topless breast cancer strip and stand-up comedy show, featuring a musical performance from Portland’s first naked lady of the stage, Viva Las Vegas, who chronicles her own battle against breast cancer in her new memoir, Magic Gardens (see Words, page 43). “Breast cancer hits the strip industry, too,” says Exotic magazine sales manager Mariah Kone, who organized the first-ever event. “Most [dancers] don’t have health insurance. The industry makes money off of breasts and we need to give back.” Oddly enough, the benefit, which will donate 100 percent of the money raised to the Susan G. Komen Breast Cancer Foundation, is just one way flesh aficionados can get their fill of mammaries this week (some on behalf of worthy charities, and others, well, just for kicks). So, in honor of breasts of all ages and levels of health, we give you This Week in Boobs.

THURSDAY—Savoir Faire
A tweaked version of the Hawthorne Theatre’s current weekly nudie show debuts, promising even more scantily clad, vaudevillian madness. Hawthorne Theatre, 3862 SE Hawthorne Blvd., 233-7100. 9 pm. $7.

FRIDAY—Tease Time: Spooktacular
Miss Frankie Tease’s monthly fleshfest celebrates Halloween with Angelique DeVil and Tana the Tattooed Lady, as well as a “Thriller” group tribute come midnight. Crush, 1400 SE Morrison St., 235-8150. 9 pm. $10. 21+.

SATURDAY—Madison Moone’s Burlesque Revue
Local burlesque mistress Madison Moone and her “amazing assets” raise moolah for the Portland Women’s Crisis Line. Vino Vixens, 2929 SE Powell Blvd., 231-8466. 9 pm Saturday, Oct. 24. $20-$25 advance, $25-$30 door.

SATURDAY—Viva Oz Vegas
It’s a mashup of Vegas showgirls and The Wizard of Oz: This time Dorothy battles the Wicked Witch of the Breast (drag burlesque star Ultra). Bagdad Theater Pub, 3702 SE Hawthorne Blvd., 236-9234. 7 pm. $20-$25.

SUNDAY—Sinferno Cabaret
Is there a better way to spend a Sunday night? A hot combo of striptease, jugglers, magicians and half-nekkid fire dancers, doused with a bit of classic rock-’n’-roll sleaze. Dante’s, 1 SW 3rd Ave., 226-6630. 8:30 pm. $7.

MONDAY—Exotic’s Breast Cancer Benefit
A dirty evening of fundraising with performances from Miss Nude Oregon 2009 and Viva Las Vegas’ band, Coco Cobra & the Killers, plus stand up comics! Bossanova Ballroom, 722 E Burnside St., 236-2454. 8 pm. $10

TUESDAY—Check Yo’self
If you don’t know how to perform a breast self-exam, check out the exhaustive, step-by-step interactive video guide from the folks at breastselfexam.ca. Don’t have your own pair? Go ahead and feel up those of somebody you love.

Headout Picks

THURSDAY OCT. 22


[MUSIC] GHOSTFACE KILLAH
Hip-hop’s most consistent rapper is back with an album of, um, RB sex jams. I guess you can’t rap about coke all the time. Berbati’s Pan, 231 SW Ankeny St., 248-4579. 9 pm. $20 advance, $25 day of show. 21+.

[MUSIC] THE JESUS LIZARD
One of rock’s most abrasive bands also boasts crazy frontman David Yow. Those in front, be warned: You’ll probably see a lot of him tonight, all up in your grill. Crystal Ballroom, 1332 W Burnside St., 225-0047. 9 pm. $22 advance, $25 day of show. All ages.

FRIDAY OCT. 23


[RAWK] CHARIOTS OF RUBBER: THE FINAL MASSACRE
Local impresario Jeffrey Wonderful’s heavy-metal rock opera is set in Coos County, where locals smell like “hooker pee” and twinned Japanese women named after nipples plot to steal hood ornaments. Theater! Theatre!, 3430 SE Belmont St., chariotsofrubber.com. 10:30 pm Thursday-Saturday, Oct. 22-24, and Thursday-Friday, Oct. 29-30. $15 in advance, $20 at the door.

SATURDAY OCT. 24


[STAGE] ALL’S WELL THAT ENDS WELL
A high-def screening of a performance of Shakespeare’s great madcap comedy by the National Theatre of London. World Trade Center, 121 SW Salmon St., 235-1101. 2 and 7 pm. $20.

[DISH] SPOTFEST:09
FlavourSpot celebrates its third birthday with free waffles and a Ms. Pac-Man tournament. FlavourSpot, corner of North Mississippi Avenue and Fremont Street, 282-9866. 9 am-9 pm. Free with donation of canned good or unwrapped toy.

[BRAAAINS] THRILL THE WORLD
The earth’s nations unite under the one-gloved banner to dress as zombies and reenact sweet dance moves from “Thriller.” 5:30 pm Saturday, Oct. 24, location TBA. $5 donation. To sign up, email ttwpdx@gmail.com. See page 41.

SUNDAY OCT. 25


[MUSIC] DEAD MAN’S BONES
Actor Ryan Gosling has a band—including a kid’s choir—to help him sing songs about the supernatural. And it’s actually pretty great. Mississippi Studios, 3939 N Mississippi Ave., 288-3895. 8 pm. $15. 21+.

MONDAY OCT. 26


[SCREEN] FAST BREAK
The night before the Blazers kick off another run at a title, check out the 1977 documentary about the last time they actually succeeded. Warning: contains Bill Walton’s feet. Clinton Street Theater, 2522 SE Clinton St., 238-8899. 7 pm. $6.
 
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