There are few conflicts in life that can't be settled with a dance-off. And although the Indianapolis Metropolitan Police Motorcycle Drill Team might not be rolling into town to show the Portland police a thing or two, it's definitely packing enough choreographed heat to win over the crowd at this year's Rose Festival Grand Floral Parade. And that's a big feat in a town where cops are better known for the use of deadly force than for synchronized stepping. With sirens ablaze, these men of the law will work it out through crowd favorites like "The Four Corner Cross," "Thread the Needle" and the "Grand Roll," all on police-issue Harley-Davidson Road Kings. And if that's not enough to rev up local civilians, they might even throw down a sweet little move called the "Evil Cross." It's all part of the game for Indianapolis' finest.
Indianapolis Lt. Bart McAtee says the drill team's mission is to "sell a very positive
side of law enforcement." Although not currently performing competitively, Indianapolis still holds the defending champion title from a police drill team showdown held by the American Legion in the 1950s. With all the bad press leveled at the Portland Police Bureau in the last few months, it's somewhat mysterious that Portland's own force shows little interest in developing their own crowd-winning routines. Lt. McAtee confirms their drill team has no current rivals—perhaps it's time the Rose City law stepped up to the plate?
GO: The KeyBank Grand Floral Parade route starts at Memorial Coliseum and winds through downtown Portland. 10 am Saturday, June 12. This weekend, the Starlight Parade travels through downtown Portland. 8:30 pm Saturday, June 5. Info and routes for both parades, as well as info on all other Rose Fest events, at rosefestival.org.
WEDNESDAY JUNE 2
Buress takes the mundane and wrings from it wry moments of humor.
THURSDAY JUNE 3
The master of the two-octave toy piano.
FRIDAY JUNE 4
This Korean joyride blasts through the Manchurian desert like a bounty hunter gone bananas.
[MUSIC/BIRTHDAY] HOLOCENE'S 7TH BIRTHDAY PARTY: MIRACLES CLUB, REPORTER, OPERATIVE ETC.
Happy birthday, Holocene! It seems like just yesterday we were checking out your warehouse and wondering how it would ever feel like home. Now you're one of our favorite places to see a show. Hurrah! Holocene, 1001 SE Morrison St., 239-7639. 8 pm. Free. 21+.
SATURDAY JUNE 5
! We may not always get along (you're 10, we're 35—there are bound to be differences), but we respect your taste in music.
[MUSIC/BIRTHDAY] TENDER LOVING EMPIRE'S THIRD B-DAY PARTY: TYPHOON, FINN RIGGINS, BOY EATS DRUM MACHINE ETC.
Happy birthday, TLE! We like your new store and the great bands on your label. In fact, we just have an all-around crush on you. Your birthday parties are always killer! Wonder Ballroom, 128 NE Russell St., 284-8686. 7 pm. $8. All ages.
SUNDAY JUNE 6
The city's gay Latinos throw a fierce fiesta.
[SCREEN, STAGE] TOPP TWINS
The Topp Twins are Kiwi lesbian sisters whose yodel-filled act incorporates comedy and politics. They appear in a QDoc film tonight, and live onstage Tuesday. Clinton Street Theater, 2522 SE Clinton St., 238-8899. 7 pm. $6-8. Mission Theater, 1624 NW Glisan St., 223-4527. 7:30 pm Tuesday. $15.