This is what a Los Angeles bar would look like if it were pulled up by its short hairs and plopped down on Burnside. Think rockers, groupies and busty burlesque-lovers sidling up to clowns (real clowns), AM radio jockeys and doughnut-shop owners. For years now, an alt-friendly crowd has been coming to Dante’s to revel in its strip-club-that’s-not-really-a-strip-club vibe. Rocker Storm Large can often be seen holding court in the VIP lounge tucked high above the goth-dressed crowd while weekly performances—including Karaoke from Hell (Mondays), Xotica Go-Go (Wednesdays) and Sinferno Cabaret (Sundays)—jiggle and thrust their unique form of entertainment from the stage. There’s pizza, too, but hey, who needs that when you can watch strippers light their boobies on fire?
Perfect Patron: Ozzy and the rest of the Osbourne clan. (BB)
HAPPY HOUR 4-8 PM MONDAY-FRIDAY: $1.50 PIZZA, $3.50 WELL DRINKS.
SMOKING, KARAOKE (live), LIVE MUSIC, DJs, FIREPLACE/PIT, COMEDY, GAMES, VIDEO POKER, EXOTIC DANCERS.