Comrades! For some time now, the Workers, the Queers, the Ladies and our Asian-American sisters and brothers have banded together in a joint struggle to defeat the comedic oppression foisted upon us by Ray Romano, Carrot Top, The Eminem Show, Morning ZOO Radio™ and Steve-O.
On this day, let us thank in particular our comrade Margaret Cho, who has helped best our capitalist enemies by providing us with cannonball laughter and machine-gun mirth. Rise up! Comrade Cho has offered us I'm the One that I Want and Notorious C.H.O. in live performance, book and movie form, where she shows how the criminal social order of Czarist Hollywood tried to kill her, BUT SHE RESISTED.
Yes, with stories about a nurse named Gwen who wished to wash her vagina, her mother's answering-machine messages and stories about combat with the EVIL OPPRESSORS, Comrade Cho has fed us a self-empowerment tonic that transcends personal upheaval.
As Comrade Cho told the People's Representative on the phone, "I was introduced recently as 'one of the funniest women working in comedy today,' and I just went off. I'm like, no, you don't say 'one of,' and you don't say 'one of the funniest women.' I was like, I am the best, and you don't even say, no, don't even attach 'woman' to it and don't say 'one.' Do not say any of that because I'm the best, I am the best...that is what the revolution is really about. It's about not accepting the tiny interactions you have with people that dishonor you, that negate your own achievements, that somehow in some small way make you feel like...shit."
Comrade Cho has shown that she is ready to uplift the people, give tools to the people, tickle the people, but her commitment to the struggle will not be DEGRADED. Comrade Cho says: "PETA, that animals-rights organization, asked me to contact the president of Korea to make a statement to the people of the nation to stop eating dogs. I don't know that motherfucker! I don't have his number on my speed dial! Oh yeah, I've got all those Korean people in my crew. That to me is insulting and racist and condescending in a way that I can't even express. Nobody really understands what I mean when I talk about that."
Comrade Cho inspires us to conquer our enemies, such as Czarist Hollywood, with organized ignoring. Comrade Cho says, "They can fuck off; it has nothing to do with me. I'm not about Hollywood. I have my own production company, and I make movies--I'm making two right now--and I don't want to do any fuckin' sitcom. I don't want to be the best friend in a 'chick flick.' It's so uninteresting to me. I'm just not available for it physically.
"My work is too important to me. I am in this because I'm a stand-up comic! I'm not in this to be a movie star, which inadvertently I am because I make movies. Who gives a shit? I mean, the movie industry is just so fuckin' vapid. There's nothing good, and nothing good ever happens. I hate the industry in that way; I just don't even care. Yeah, they fucked me over, but that's not why I hate them. I hate them because they suck."
Down with the 1-800-Collect commercial! Long live Margaret Cho's mother! Down with Maid in Manhattan! Long live Margaret Cho's fisting stories!
The revolution will materialize.
Arlene Schnitzer Concert Hall, 1037 SW Broadway, 796- 9293. 7:30 pm Thursday, March 13. $29.50, $39.50+ advance (Ticketmaster).