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April 3rd, 2013 MATTHEW KORFHAGE | Headout
 

Headout: The Pitiful Princes

Disney princes offering themselves as escorts for hire.

headout-01_3922PHOTOS BY TORBAKHOPPER/CC; PAUKRUS/CC

When we saw that the Star Theater was hosting scantily clad Disney princesses getting down with a stripper pole, it looked a bit familiar: Heck, it’s basically the plot of Spring Breakers, except in that movie James Franco plays the pole. 

But while both Breakers and Queens of the Pole will pretend they’re sullying store-bought innocence while snickering into their billfolds, we’ll let you in on a secret: Disney was always dirty. The ladies may be the obvious showpieces, but the real meat for sale in a Disney movie is always the prince: a Clearasil-clean, empty-headed gigolo who trades on the romantic fever dreams of impressionable young girls.

Small wonder, then, we caught these otherwise unemployable princes advertising their affections in the back pages of some less-reputable trade magazines. 

PHOTOS BY TORBAKHOPPER/CC; PAUKRUS/CC

GO: Queens of the Pole: Disney Princess Edition is at the Star Theater, 13 NW 6th Ave., 248-4700, on Saturday, April 6. 10 pm. $10-$15. 21+.
 
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