Leprecan't

Famous Irish people who are not leprechauns.

By WW Staff

Picture an Irishman. Who are you picturing? The Notre Dame mascot? The Lucky Charms leprechaun? The leprechaun from Leprechaun?

But did you know that less than 10 percent of all Irish people self-identify as leprechauns?

We looked at Wikipedia's "list of Irish people" and cross-referenced it with a list of leprechauns. We discovered that very few famous Irish people are also leprechauns. Here is a list of Irish people who are not leprechauns.


Sinéad O'Connor

Very short. Thought to have magical qualities. Nowhere near our plane of consciousness. But, technically, not a leprechaun.


Bono

Has the pot of gold. Owns the rainbow. Is Irish. Not a leprechaun.


Samuel Beckett

Ever tried. Ever failed to be a leprechaun. No matter. Tried again. Failed again. Failed better. Still, never a leprechaun.


Saoirse Ronan

Had the leprechaun bleached out of her.


Evanna Lynch

Played Luna Lovegood. Not a wizard. Not a leprechaun. Just sort of weird.


Rudy Ruettiger

Traded his eternal reward to a leprechaun for the chance to play football. Not a leprechaun.


Tilda Swinton

Part Irish. Part leprechaun.


Daniel Day-Lewis

Lived as a leprechaun for eight months among the faery folk in preparation for a stage role. Married a leprechaun. Not a leprechaun.


Colin Farrell

Was a leprechaun, but lost his powers during the filming of the Miami Vice remake.


Liam Neeson

Has a very particular set of skills. None of them make him a leprechaun. Killed a leprechaun.


Enya

Famous for passing off ancient leprechaun cant as "New Age music." Has extensive business dealings with Jiminy "Nucks" O'Tolley's leprechaun crime family but is not herself considered a "pure blood" leprechaun.


Colm J. Meaney

Not a leprechaun but maintains a colony of enslaved leprechaun jewel miners at his country house near Ballymena.


Kenneth Branagh

Like all dull men, he claims to have a leprechaun inside him trying to get out. Not a leprechaun.


Patton Oswalt

Not Irish, but is a leprechaun.

GO: Get drunk and pretend you're part Irish. March 17, all day, everywhere.

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