Gay Pride & Prejudice

Wow. I couldn't believe those phobic-filled words were coming out of my own mouth. But there I was, in a staff meeting, trying to decipher the mess surrounding Portland's only openly transgendered ex-cop (if you want to read more about him, you're going to have to thumb back a few pages to this week's cover story). At that meeting, some of my co-workers may have thought that because I'm an outspoken homo, I would come out fighting for this female-to-male transsexual's rights. Well, they were wrong. Just because I'm gay doesn't mean I'm not prejudiced.

I was raised as a "normal" American boy. And just like a lot of other "normal" folk, my young psyche was riddled with "isms": racism, sexism, ageism. Later on in my life, when I accepted the fact that I was gay and I wanted to live my life as a gay male, it became important to hang with my "own kind" (read: gay guys of all stripes) at our "own places" (gay bars and gyms). Whether I was conscious of it or not, I had wiggled my tight-fitting 501s into what is nothing short of a self-imposed, segregated society.

Oh sure, on the outside I'm full of pith and vinegar when it comes to speaking up for my queer brethren's rights--as long as their opinions are like my own. But on the inside I still have the same fears and biases I was raised with when it comes to issues I don't understand. And I don't understand Woodcock. Why would anyone who changes their plumbing expect to be accepted behind the badge? I think I'm probably like the stereotypical cop. I have a male ideal: strong, butch and born with a dick. Who was Damon kidding--other than himself?

So, go ahead, spank me on the ass and call me a bigot. I admit I sure sound like one. I guess I'm no different from all you straight people who hate fags.

Yet I have another confession: I love Damon Woodcock. Though he never intended to be, he's a radical. I know it's always the radicals who make the biggest difference in this world, and I'm open enough to realize Damon's "coming out" is going to make it easier for others. Although I may never be able to understand the thought process that led Damon down his gender-fucked path, I respect him for sticking to his guns.