WE’RE FUNNY, AREN’T WE?…AREN’T WE?

WINNERS

1. In politics, timing—and plausible deniability—is everything. Mayor-elect Sam Adams landed a front-page Oregonian story last Friday about his long-delayed (and WW-endorsed—“Green With Envy,” April 16, 2008) plan to tax non-reusable shopping bags. The story’s timing? Perfect. If Adams hadn’t dropped the bag-tax bomb, the day’s news might’ve been his decision not to put his $464 million transportation package (see this week's Murmurs) on the November ballot. Coincidence? Surely.

2. Silverton Police Officer Tony Gonzalez won out over Celtic public opinion when a Marion County grand jury ruled he was justified in the June 30 shooting death of Irish citizen Andrew “AJ” Hanlon. While Gonzalez dodged that threat, he remains in jail on unrelated charges of child sex abuse.

3. As first reported Friday on WWire, corporate restaurateurs and the Oregon Restaurant Association scored when Multnomah County commissioners Lisa Naito and Maria Rojo de Steffey came out in opposition to a proposed rule that would force chain eateries to post calorie counts on menus. That makes Commissioner Lonnie Roberts the deciding vote on the rule when it comes to the five-member Board of Commissioners on Thursday, July 31.

4. Our children is learning! The feds last week said Oregon’s charter schools are doing a good job and handed the state $9.5 million to create even more of them. Forget what your parents told you about not paying you for good grades.

LOSERS

1. After a WW story about ex-Oregon GOP chief and current deadbeat Craig Berkman’s donations to John McCain’s presidential campaign (see “Craig’s List,” July 9, 2008), McCain gave us the silent treatment on the money. That changed when the story got front-page play last week in The Washington Post. McCain and the Republican Party in Florida, where Berkman now lives, have quietly re-gifted the tainted dough to charity. Better late than never.

2. Just blew it. Nike pulled Wieden & Kennedy ads for its Hyperdunk basketball shoes after a blogosphere blow-up that blasted the “balls in the face” ads as homophobic (See WWire for the ads). The Score’s take on the ads: Silly? Yeah. But so is the criticism.

3. GQ’s current issue calls Seattle the nation’s “least funny city” on account of its painfully earnest embrace of all things artisanal and eco-whatever. Does that mean the Condé Nasties at GQ think Oregonians have more fun? Oh no. “By Seattle,’” writes Esquire’s snootier cousin, “we also mean lsquo;Portland.’” The fact that we just spent five minutes trying to think of a comeback sort of proves their point.