WINNERS

1. Some 2,500 domestically partnered Oregon gay and lesbian couples can unbunch their panties. The U.S. 9th Circuit Court of Appeals ruled last week in Lemons v. Bradbury, the case seeking to revive last year’s failed referendum on Oregon’s domestic partnership law, that Lemons can basically suck it. The result? “Well-meaning” voters won’t be able to question queer rights on the ballot this November.

2. Glass of Pinot with dinner, Bluto? The chief execs of Lewis & Clark College, Willamette University and Pacific University in Oregon are campaigning with many of their counterparts nationwide to lower the drinking age from 21 to 18. The thinking? Binge-drinking frat boys and girls gone wild can be taught to drink in moderation. Campus police must be delighted at the prospect. Without alcohol-fueled assaults, date rapes and DUIIs, they won’t have much to do but look for stolen bikes and play cards until retirement.

3. Every morning last week in front of the new Bikini Coffee shop downtown (see “Java Jugs,” WW, July 9, 2008) a couple of fully dressed female protesters defended women’s rights not to wear bikinis in the workplace. Passing cars honked both in support—and ridicule—of signs like “I’d like a regular coffee with room for sexism.” The coffee shop wins because the protest got it attention—we too sip from the cup of media coverage with more pictures at wweek.com.

LOSERS

1. The Bay of Pigs Evasion: Republican congressional candidate [b]Mike Erickson made an ostensibly “humanitarian” mission to Cuba in 2004. But The Oregonian raised multiple questions about Erickson’s trip that did include “Comandante Fidel Castro’s Annual Gala Cigar Dinner and Auction”—plus showgirls at the Tropicana. The Score is impressed: When the “pro-life” Erickson paid for an ex-girlfriend’s abortion, we didn’t think he could make himself look even more like un baboso. But then he did.

2.Yes, the Swoosh is outfitting U.S. athletes with gear to wear on the Olympics medal stand. But you don’t need to be Wieden or Kennedy to know Nike is nursing Olympic-sized disappointment so far at the injury to Nike-wearing Chinese hurdler/icon Liu Xiang and the gold medal of Puma-sporting “world’s fastest man” Usain Bolt.

3. Democratic Senate candidate Jeff Merkley whiffed a softball question last week on what he thought about Russia’s invasion of Georgia. While chewing a hotdog. On video. “I haven’t heard what’s going on in Georgia,” Merkley said, at first not realizing his interrogator was asking about the country, not the state. “I was thinking Atlanta, Jimmy Carter.” Even then, he wasn’t able to answer the question. Dude needs a BlackBerry or something.