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Dr. Know: So is the Willamette River safe or not?

Dr. Know
At the south end of the Eastbank Esplanade, people lie in the sun and swim in the river, endorsed by WW. At the north end of the Esplanade, a sign says not to eat fish caught in the river. Who shoul   More
Wednesday, September 3, 2014 MARTY SMITH

Dr. Know: Where can I pee in Portland?

Dr. Know
My doctor tells me I need to drink eight glasses of water a day. Unfortunately, that leads to another problem: Portland doesn’t have many pots to pee in that are open to the public. Where can    More
Wednesday, August 27, 2014 MARTY SMITH

Dr. Know: How do I get my money when I win the Oregon Lottery next week?

Dr. Know
I’m planning to win the Oregon Lottery next week. How do I get my money? The prize will be way too big for my bank’s insurance coverage. Do they set up a Swiss bank account, or what? —Alway   More
Wednesday, August 20, 2014 MARTY SMITH

Dr. Know: Why do lesbians go first in LGBT?

Dr. Know
Why did the gay community adopt the acronym “LGBT,” placing the lesbians first? It was gay men and drag queens at Stonewall—I find it appalling that lesbians get top billing! Can we chan   More
Wednesday, August 13, 2014 MARTY SMITH

Who pilots those small planes that buzz Northeast Portland at dawn?

Dr. Know
Am I correct in assuming that the small planes that buzz Northeast Portland at dawn are piloted by bourgeois joy riders and not heroes on humanitarian missions? —Sleepless in NE I can tell by    More
Wednesday, August 6, 2014 MARTY SMITH

Has Portlandia doomed us to be overrun by annoying sightseers?

Dr. Know
I work downtown, and I’m getting tired of tourists asking me, “When do the Zoobombers go by?” or “Where are the famous food carts?” It seems to gets worse every day. Has Portlandia doome   More
Wednesday, July 30, 2014 MARTY SMITH

Dr. Know: Current Trends

Can you float against the current in the Willamette?

Dr. Know
I recently floated the Willamette from Oaks Park to the Sellwood Bridge. Soon after, I found myself in a vicious bar argument with a friend who swears I couldn’t have floated north to south,   More
Wednesday, July 23, 2014 MARTY SMITH

Dr. Know: Lone Star Invasion

Why am I seeing more Texan license plates recently?

Dr. Know
I look at license plates while driving to see where people are from. I’ve seen 12 from Texas in the past two weeks. Are these Texans here for a big wedding, or are they part of the evangelical    More
Wednesday, July 16, 2014 MARTY SMITH

Dr. Know: Commuter Conundrum

Why is traffic so much worse in the evening than in the morning?

Dr. Know
I commute from downtown to Tigard via I-5. In the morning, it takes me 20 minutes or less. However, on my way home, traffic is often a parking lot. Where do all these commuters come from in th   More
Wednesday, July 9, 2014 MARTY SMITH

Dr. Know: Edge of Midnight

Why do some park signs say "Open until 12:01 am" instead of midnight?

Dr. Know
I’ve noticed that posted hours for some parks are expressed as “Open until 12:01 am.” What’s wrong with “Open until 12 am” or even “Open until midnight”? Is this because of limited   More
Wednesday, July 2, 2014 MARTY SMITH

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