Look Out! Portland Named World's 46th Best City To Live

Okay—let's get this straight. Portland has never won an award for best nightlife or cultural amenities—but Portland is one of the world's best places to pitch your tent, say the experts. The revered Mercer Human Resource Consulting Annual Quality of Living Survey named PDX the 46th best place to live in the world, 45 places behind top-ranked Zurich, Switzerland—sandwiched between Chicago and Lisbon.

"Most livable city" is a nice award—the award they sometimes give to the kid who tries really hard. We may never get the Olympics and we're stuck with only one under-performing sports franchise. In-and-Out Burger hasn't opened a franchise. Donald Trump won't return our calls. We don't have any world-class architecture. Frank Gehry hasn't graced us with a crumply-looking metal building. But...we're the 46th best city in the world and we have a tram. Does your city have a tram?

We have great restaurants, better coffee than your city, Paris Hilton look-alikes, doughnuts shaped like genitalia, and a Mayor who bikes to work—though what else he does is up for debate. We are Portland, bitches, and we are the 46th best city in the world—three places ahead of Seattle (49th place).