Each week our culture scientists rank their 10 favorite things in the universe. The resulting list is infallible. The list is perfect. If you don't agree with the list, you are wrong. Some items may stay atop the list for weeks, others may only make a brief appearance. Some items are Portland-centric, but only because Portland is at the center of the universe. Please do not write to us, asking for the metrics behind the list. We will not provide source material. We will not be swayed. Bow down to the list. Love the list, as the list loves all things. Let the list move through you. (And, you know, if you have suggestions for the list, stick them in the comments section below.)

1. Police Chief Mike Reese Rocking with Darcelle XV
In an interesting bit of PR by the police department, police Chief Mike Reese took some time out from defending taser-happy police officers to rock out on guitar with drag legend Darcelle XV at a benefit for the homeless on October 5, 2011. A  full year later, the kind people at Hawthorne Books graced us with a picture.   

2. Lonesome's Pizza
Because it's life-changing to finally have good pizza available by delivery on the west side. Brownie points for going outside its delivery area to service the WW office the other day when we were starving and busy. You have made a great contribution to journalism, Lonesome's. 

3. Why Snoop is voting for Obama
Commentary pales and recedes before this, Snoop Dogg's Lion's magnum opus, in which he somehow explains the whole of American politics. A quick fact check, however: Obama is not definitively known to have sniffed Beyonce's neck, nor does he look like he can fight. But Mitt Romney does indeed have a dancing horse.

4. Nigel Jaquiss swearing at the office printer
Proof that even a great, Pulitzer-winning journalist can occasionally be foiled by a "fucking piece of shit."

5. This:
Presented without comment.

6. Big Bird
Though his Saturday Night Live spot was kinda meh, nabbing Caroll Spinney (who's played the eight-foot tall yellow bird since 1969) was something of a coup for the show, and it made for a nice jab at Mitt Romney, who dismissed PBS in last week's debate. And there was this joke: Who likes debates? De-fishes. 

These people cook fictional foods from books and movies and video games. It may replace My Drunk Kitchen as our favorite YouTube cooking show. 

8. Hell on Wheels
Back in the list after seven weeks because holy shit, that finale. Everyone's dead!

9. Beard beer
Combining two of Portland's Portlandiest things, Rogue Ales brewmaster John Maier plucked some hairs from his face (he claims not to have shaved since 1978), found some yeast and cooked up a beer. Expect a final version of the brew, "New Crustacean," in early 2013. Rogue swears this isn't revolting, but really? Eww.

10. COPS: Skyrim
Clearly we're behind on this one, but man is this a brilliant idea.