UPDATE 1:56 pm, May 2: Dueling Chips! This appears to be the real deal, as evidenced by actual potato chips and crazy-goopy confit. This one was sent in by Kevin Finn's daughter, who brought a real camera into play. Are we having fun yet? Is this like the Avignon pope? 

This second burger is the true monster we always believed it might be: insane vicosity and trashy crunch and shameless devotion to elevated BMI. Eagles!


UPDATE 1:47 pm, May 2: Kevin Finn, President of Iron Hill Brewery, sent us a camera-phone photo of his yesterday's May Day lunch, which just so happened to be a Chip Kelly burger.

The chips, it would appear, form kind of a gratin amid the mushrooms (you know, like in your Midwestern grandma's meatloaf), and the onions aren't nearly so soggy as a lot of confits we've encountered. So we stand a bit corrected on our worries about the overall texture of said burger. Consider this jury 100% out on this heart attack of a Chip Kelly burger beast!

Original Story, 3:49 PM, May 1, 2013:

The city of Philadelphia is literally eating Chip Kelly for lunch today.

Former Oregon Ducks football coach Kelly is taking over as coach of the Philadelphia Eagles (a team best known for losing to the eventual Super Bowl champions in the first game of every season), so Philadelphia-area chain Iron Hill Brewery and Restaurant named a burger for him today. 

And the Chip Kelly Burger is not just any burger. It is seemingly the grossest burger in the history of burgers, with blue cheese swirling in a can't-not-be-soggy onion confit and mushroom sauce combination. And if the fetid goop of it all weren't enough, Iron Hill has gone and topped it with potato chips. Because apparently they figure Chip Kelly is just the type of self-punishing glutton who would dump potato chips into his onion confit burger.

Or maybe they just figure he likes to eat his words. (Or at least, his name.)

This isn't the first time Philadelphia has greeted him with inappropriate potato chips. The SB Nation fan site for the Eagles made him a truly terrifying Chip Kelly chip-spiked meatloaf.

Meanwhile, Oregon State Rep. Brent Barton is less worried about how to feed Chip chips and more worried he's the type to dine and dash: Barton has introduced a bill that would make coaches liable for costs incurred as a result of knowing violations of NCAA rules.