Don't you publishers ever
get sick of sex? Another month or two has gone by and once again, the Willamette Week office is filling up with review copies of new and soon to be published dirty books.
Seriously, I trip on bare backing manuals and kinky niche erotica collections every time I leave my desk to get a cup of coffee. As I explained last time we did this,
in February, we're just too tired and sore to read the entirety of every romance novel and better sex guide that somebody mails to us. So, Assistant Arts Editor Ben Waterhouse and I divided up a pile of the past two month's most promising contenders, opened each one up and chose a quote at random.
Do Not Disturb: Hotel Sex Stories, edited by Rachel Kramer Bussel
"By mid afternoon my buttocks are crisscrossed with scarlet streaks and I've shaken through two more climaxes." —from "Reunion" by Lisabet Sarai
Daddies: Gay Erotic Stories, edited by Richard Labonté
“The old man grumbled, ‘fuckeengitgottammit!'”
My Little Red Book, edited by Rachel Kauder Nalebuff
“So I wrapped the used pad in toilet paper, placed it in a brown paper bag—the bag from the store where I'd bought the pads in the first place, probably—and stuck the whole thing in the back of my closet, and as I used more pads, I put them there.”
Unlimited Intimacy: Reflections on the Subculture of Barebacking by Tim Dean
"Apparently the heterosexuality of these men remains uncompromised by their unsheathed erections rubbing together to the point of orgasm inside an anus, because the anus belonged to a woman."
Nothing Right, Antonya Nelson
“Downstairs, she assured Violet she would return the sheets by noon, leave them on the front porch.” [Ed note: Okay, not actually pornographic, but the cover makes it look so.]
How to Live With A Huge Penis by Dr. Richard Jacob & Rev. Owen Thomas
"Vomit pours over your penis and shoots out their nostrils, and nobody goes home happy."
Fireside: The Lakeshore Chronicles by Susan Wiggs
"There were a thousand more kisses, and laughter between the gasps and sighs of pleasure, and Kim let herself get lost in him, in a place that felt safe and fulfilling, a place she never wanted to leave."
The Mile High Club: Plane Sex Stories edited by Rachel Kramer Bussel
"One of her Louboutins fell to the floor, and she wrapped her stocking-covered leg around my legs and undulated her body as she came, milking my release from me with the clasp of her thighs rippling through to the velvety clench of her pussy." —from "Aisle Seat" by Stan Kent
Playing with Fire: Taboo Erotica, edited by Alison Tyler
“Olivier gripped my waist and the stranger gripped my hair. I whimpered, the cock muffling any sounds that tried to escape.”
Surfer Boys, Edited by Neil Plakcy
“The surfer with the cast-iron balls still wasn't coming up.”
Itty Bitty Kitty Ditties by Tim Hodapp
"Puddy the cat,/ pitch black, barely stirred,/ batting two large, green eyes/ from a shadow that purred." [Ed note: Uh, sorry, apparently this book really is about cats.]