Nice Pecs, Portland: Men's Fitness Wolf-Whistles at Our Exceptionally Fit Bodies. Again.

Yes, yes: Portland has once again been ranked in the top ten fittest cities in America by Men's Fitness, an honor that is growing downright dull in its regularity. This year we're ranked number six, one spot worse than last year. This drop in stature doubtless will inspire some of you to put in an extra 15 minutes at the gym tonight.

But what's most interesting about this announcement is seeing where our city ranks in the dubiously scientific categories the lifestyle magazine uses to grade our physical desirability. For example: Portland scores points for having one health-food store for every 7,242 citizens, and 43 percent more sporting-goods stores per capita than the average American city. In my personal favorite criterion, Portland is praised for cultivating the second most rowing-machine use in the country. (Nautilus is grateful.) We were docked points, however, for having 22 percent more pizza joints in town than the Men's Fitness survey average, and for our poor participation in cheerleading.

Really: We try out for cheerleading 79 percent less than other cities. Sometimes Men's Fitness doubts our commitment to Sparkle Motion.