Sacrilege! (for only $3.95)

Once upon a time, the holiday of Christmas revolved around celebrating the birth of Christ. There were angels and wise men and frankincense and myrrh. In the past few years, though, retail shops like downtown Portland own's Funny Bone Store have been walking a fine line on the edge of hell's precipitous depths. Cards with family photos wishing loved ones holiday blessings have been replaced with boxed sets of a dozen cards that contain “Jesus' Bar Tips.” And Jesus action figures have stolen the Good Book's thunder.

Luckily, there are a few gifts this Christmas that promote religious reflection during normal activities. According to Gary Hopping at Funny Bone, another great seller during the holiday season is Holy Toast, a stamper that creates an imprint of Mary on your toast in the morning. Isn't a little worship with your jam exactly what the priest ordered? For less than your weekly tithes, Holy Toast is a steal at $4.95. And although the Church will not condone this, you can Grow Your Own Baby Jesus! for only $3.95. Hopping says that the cost of Jesus paraphernalia at his shop ranges from $2.95 to $19.95, and I believe him. After all, lying is a sin.