September 22nd, 2008 5:33 pm | by Matt Graham News | Posted In: CLEAN UP

Nobody Works Anymore:The WORST Emmys EVER!


Did anybody watch the Emmys last night? What the hell was that?

If you missed it, the show was emceed by the five nominees for Best Reality Show Host: Jeff Probst, Howie Mandel, Heidi Klum, Ryan Seacrest and Tom Bergeron. Their opening bit went on for what seemed like an eternity as they took turns essentially saying "We're just reality hosts and we don't have anything funny to say. Really, we don't. This is reality. There's nothing on the teleprompter. We've got nothing." It ended up being funny in the way only train wrecks involving people you dislike can be funny because they actually did have nothing and and nobody in the crowd could figure out if they were supposed to laugh or not. The next time somebody asks me what "irony" is, I'll just describe this bit. Maybe it was supposed to be some meta, high-concept art thing? I don't know. It sure was painful to watch though.

(The intro video's merely mediocre. Fast forward to about the four-minute mark to see the real chaos.)

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Isn't it great the way Tina Fey and Amy Poehler immediately upstage them afterward? And what's up with Probst being too cool to wear a tie? Also, in a truly heart-warming moment that got cut off in the vid., Ari bitch-slapped the hosts in his acceptance speech afterward.

Here's another painful Emmy bit, courtesy of Josh Groban. I was actually kind of impressed by his quick-change vocal versatility here, but judging by what everybody else wrote this morning, I was the only one.

[youtube -G6Vf-eKgPU]

Fortunately the show wasn't all atrocious.Thank God for Ricky Gervais and Steve Carell.

[youtube RZp6cR4bxbY]

And now for something completely different: apparently, if I were a Palin baby, my name would be Shoulder Frontier.
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