April 13th, 2008 | by Byron Beck News | Posted In: CLEAN UP, Politics, Politics

Party Girl: Chelsea Clinton Cuts Loose With 2,000 Gay Men in Red Dresses

     
Tags: gay
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I was supposed to ask her questions like "where are you most likely to disagree with your mom or your dad?" or "did you ever call your mom at 3 am and how did she react?"

But all I could think of was that: "I am...standing in front of Hill and Bill's kid...in a red Mary Kay Cosmetics Collection dress...I'd just bought that day at the Goodwill...how weird is that?"

Yes, Chelsea Clinton made it to the infamous "Red Dress" Party.

Not to be confused with that other annual "Red Dress" fundraiser, this is the "Red Dress Party," a mondo-alcohol-fueled dance party where nearly 2,000 gay men in various states of red dress undress (and several nearly naked straight men as well as one very colorfully decorated naked woman) invade a warehouse in Northeast Portland and dance their collective asses off to pounding disco music and the incredible Storm Large and her Balls (they were beyond fabulous). Large, a bigtime Obama supporter even dedicated one of her more infamous songs, Ladylike, to Chelsea's mama.

According to my sources Ms. Clinton moved heaven and earth (well, she just trimmed some of her other meetings in Oregon Saturday that included stops in Eugene and Portland State University) so that she could make the par-ty.

At 9:30 pm, just as we were walking in, I noticed one of the Governor's more attractive staffers (Hans Bernard) heading toward the door with a very attractive blonde.

"Oh my god, it's Chelsea," I screamed.

Before I knew it Hans had my partner, Juan Martinez, and me next to her for a quick photo.

And then we had a conversation. It was quick. I don't recall much of it. And I hadn't even had a drink yet.

Suffice to say I think I said something about how much crap I've received for writing something about how her mom should be the next President.

She was very sweet and talked about how much she liked Oregon and how it had been a really long day.

After pleasantries I suggested that we join her at whatever her next party was.

She said, "oh, I'm sorry, I have to run. I'm on a red-eye to Philadelphia."

And then, poof, like Cinderella she was gone.

I heard one of the reasons she left early was she really wanted to ride the MAX train. She had heard so much about our mass transit system and she wanted to check it out for herself. I can't imagine that is what the way she got back to the airport for her flight out of town, but that's what my sources say.

Oh, that Chelsea.
 
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