Saving the Earth, One Crotch at a Time.

1. HAYNESCredits: Cameron WittigHAYNES BOX OFFICE: Portland-based director Todd Haynes told WW last month that “the door seems to be open and the welcome mat is extended” for him to return to HBO after 21 Emmy nominations for his Mildred Pierce miniseries. Looks like he’s walking in: Deadline.com reported Monday that Haynes has inked a deal with HBO to direct Dope, an adaptation of Sara Gran’s novel about a reformed hooker and heroin addict who becomes a private eye. (Julianne Moore is in talks to play the gumshoe.) Here’s hoping it doesn’t completely distract him from his tea party movie—or, as we’ve started calling it around here, Michele Bachmann Gets Spanked.

1. REAL-ESTATE ROULETTE: The Southeast Division space last home to Artemis Cafe will soon become a sandwich shop with wine and spirits called Double Dragon. Despite the promising name, the “coin-operated game” box on its OLCC form was sadly un-ticked, meaning no actual Double Dragon will be available. >> Adorable Montavilla pie and booze store Immortal Pie and Larder closed Saturday, Aug. 13. In an email, co-owner Morgan Ennis announced she had come to the decision “after much thought and doing-of-math.” >> Foster-Powell’s Guapo Comics and Coffee will soon close—in its current incarnation, at least—after almost six years in business. Although the coffee shop will remain and Guapo will sell comics online, the physical comic store is going. There will be a goodbye party and sale starting 6 pm on Friday, Aug. 26, with the sale continuing through Aug. 28.

1. TWO GIRLS, TWO CUPS: Toni Craige and Sarah Konner love biking, meeting new people and...using menstrual cups. The earnest pair of twentysomethings are in Portland this week as part of a month-long bike trip down the West Coast to promote the use of reusable rubber hoo-ha cups instead of tampons or pads. No, confirms Craige, who works in social services in Seattle, this is not a Portlandia skit. Yes, she and Konner (who lives in Philadelphia) really dig cups, which at $35 each can be used for three to four years and save at least six pounds of blood-soaked trash from landing in your local dump every year. And no, they don’t think this is a gross thing to talk about with strangers. “Anything that puts women in closer contact with their bodies is liberating. [With a cup] you have to touch your body and you see what the fluid looks like that day,” says Craige. “I think I was a little hesitant of the mechanics of it [the first time I used one]. But I’ve had sex and I’ve masturbated, so it’s not like I haven’t stuck things up there before.” The women plan to sleep in strangers’ yards and surviving on $4 a day during the trip. Check in on their monthly progress, donate funds or find out where they’ll be handing out earth-friendly vag-pluggage at sustainablecycles.org. The Sustainable Cycles ladies will appear at In Other Words (8 NE Killingsworth Ave.) 6:30 pm Tuesday August 23.

WWeek 2015