Teddy Pendergrass, “Turn off the Lights”

"Would you rub me down in some burnin' hot oils, baby, yeah?" Probably the best slow-dance song ever by the (reportedly tranny-chasing) King of the Quiet Storm. I used to spin this 45 in my Fort Riley, Kan., basement for late-'70s junior high parties.

Barry Manilow, “Weekend in New England”

I was a fervent acolyte of the much-disparaged Barry. I remember reading the words "his boyfriend" in a late-'70s


magazine profile. Did I just imagine it? Barry, if you read this, I still LOVE YOU.

Janis Ian, “At Seventeen”

"Inventing lovers on the phone/ Repenting other lives unknown/ That call and say/ Come dance with me/ And murmur vague obscenities/ At ugly girls like me/ At seventeen." 'Nuff fuckin' said, my beautiful Sapphic sister.

Gary Wright, “Dream Weaver”

This song always blows away the crowd at the end of the night. He gets everything right. Surfer-glam good looks, spacy MDMA atmospherics, an ideal BPM and the rare double beat for true '70s grind action.

Hall & Oates, “She’s Gone”

H&O was one of the few white acts allowed on black radio in the '70s. Hell, I thought they were black till I saw their picture—and then I just thought they were gay.

SEE IT: Director/actor/DJ John Cameron Mitchell's Mattachine Dance Party hits Branx on Saturday, Nov. 5. 9 pm. $5 before 10 pm, $7 after. 21+.