Look, Guys, You Can't Just Sell Jell-O Shots on the Beaches of Sauvie Island

These and other lessons can be found in an unusually entertaining Oregon State Police crime blotter.

The Oregon State Police is sick of your drunken shenanigans on Sauvie Island. So they're calling out the bad behavior of beachgoers.

As crime blotters go, it's a fun read.

In a press release sent out this evening, state police listed the scofflaws they caught in a single weekend, June 24-26, on Portland's pumpkin-patch Jersey Shore.

The OSP's "saturation patrol" netted the arrest or citation of 10 people for driving (or, in one case, boating) while intoxicated, as well as multiple traffic, parking and boating violation citations.

Most notably, the cops also crushed the entrepreneurial dreams of one man who had set up a Jell-O-shot pop-up shop on the beach, selling out of a cooler to teenagers:

The intent of the Oregon State Police blotter is clear: They want people to think twice before making irresponsible decisions on a long 4th of July weekend.

But the side effect is equally clear: An anthropological study of other people's irresponsible decisions.

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