Gossip Should Have No Friends

  1. RID OF HER?: James Westby, the Portland director who made Film Geek and The Auteur (though at the moment he may actually be better known for a video surveying the width of Storm Large’s vagina), has put together a trailer for his newest feature, Rid of Me. You can watch it on wweek.com, but here’s the gist: Katie O’Gradyis not at all popular with her husband’s Portland friends, and after one especially traumatizing softball game, she goes goth as fuck and starts smoking Kools behind the gym. Also, not to give anything away, but it looks like Storm Large gets her wide vagina MURDERED. Or maybe just injured. But probably murdered. In related news, Large appears as a sexy serial killer in publicity for Evil at Heart, the newest book in local author Chelsea Cain’s Beauty Killer series. The songstress portrays Gretchen Lowell, Cain’s girly answer to Hannibal Lecter, who enjoys carving hearts into men’s chests before making them drink Drano. Check out the book’s faux fan site, iheartgretchenlowell.com.
  2. APOCALYPSE WOW: When the zombie apocalypse happens—and with 2012 looming, you can bet your brains it will—most people will fend off undead hordes with knee-jerk survival skills. But most people don’t have James Gunn, operator of NW Tactical Adventures, a 165-acre property outside of PDX used for simulated war games that just happens to double as the Zombie Research Society’s Portland Regional Safe Zone. Gunn is holding The Zombie Apocalypse, a two-day survival event in which survivors blast away at an army of ghouls using Airsoft guns. Attendees have the option to play paramilitary personnel, fast zombies or civilians. A fee of $50 for the weekend includes camping, survival training, zombie flicks and more. For the war games (four in total, one Saturday night), Gunn promises explosions, horror, mayhem and the most realistic zombie-combat nightmare possible. Registration deadline is Sept. 18 for the Sept. 26-27 event. For details, visit nwtacticaladventures.com.
  1. BALDWIN WATCH, PART 1: And so the Great Daniel Baldwin Experiment begins. A veteran of Celebrity Fit Club and a lot of cocaine, the second eldest of the four Baldwin brothers has arrived in Portland to begin fulfilling his promise to bring us locally produced cash-cow reality television. And already the city is exceeding his expectations: “Hey, How about Mayor Sam Adams of Portland Oregon,” he wrote on his Twitter feed (twitter.com/BALDWINDANIEL) on Friday night. “This guy is the real deal. He cares about his people and backs it with his ACTIONS !!!!” He was even more excited on Sunday: “P town, just like I pictured it. Sky scrapers and every thang !!!!” There is absolutely no way this partnership can end badly.
  2. CORRECTION: Last week we wrote that the space housing Northeast all-ages venue The Wail was available for rent. The Scoop ran before former resident Lucy Greene called to clarify that even though she is moving out of the house, The Wail will remain open. Check out the thewail.com for information on upcoming shows.

WWeek 2015

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