November 4th, 2009 CASEY JARMAN | Special Section Stories
 

Hair Play

For Blazers, what goes on above the ears is as important as what goes on between them.

     
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Basketball seasons come and go. Hair grows even after you’re dead. WW looks back on some of the best hairdos in Blazer history. Illustrations by Lukas Ketner

Bill Walton (’74–’79)
“Sensitive Lumberjack Gone Wild”
Besides bringing Portland a championship, his many injuries and his overstatements as an announcer (“That was the worst inbound pass in Phoenix Suns franchise history”), his hair is what Bill Walton is best known for.

Cliff Robinson (’89–’97)
“Chrome Dome (with a twist)”

Michael Jordan may have made bald beautiful in the NBA, but Uncle Cliffy’s similarly hairless dome was crowned by an iconic headband that inspired a whole generation of imposters (including lovable former Blazers Bonzi Wells and Zach Randolph).

Buck Williams (’89–’96)
“The Intimidator”

You could have landed a fighter jet on Buck Williams’ head. The flattop was a common look in the ’80s (see: Grace Jones, Dolph Lundgren, Will Smith, et al.), but when Buck combined it with his thick white playing goggles, it was an Urkel-esque thing of beauty. David Robinson’s flattop was a cheap imitation.

Clyde Drexler (’83–’95)
“Au Naturel”

The great thing about Clyde’s hair is just how little work he put into it. Well before he turned 30, Drexler looked like your dad. And though he’d later shave his head (and win a championship. Huh.) as a Houston Rocket, the Glide’s early Portland look said, “Yeah, I’m bald. It helps me fly better.”

Brian Grant (’97–’00)
“One Love”

Between the dreads and the Bob Marley tattoo, you just knew that Brian Grant was smoking a little irie while he praised Jah in the off-season. That was enough to make stoner Portland fall in love with the guy while explosive young prospect Jermaine O’Neal rotted away on the bench.

Darius Miles (’04–’08)“Dr. Darius Cornrows/Mr. Miles ’Fro”
You forgot, didn’t you, that Darius Miles let his cornrows loose a couple of times! The resulting mega-fro put Ben Wallace to shame and made then-scrawny (this was before his love affair with Cold Stone Creamery) Miles look like a 60-year-old crazy lady.

Greg Oden (’07-present)
“The Oh-No
Faux-Hawk”

One of the worst fashion moves in Portland Trail Blazer history, but it gave us something to talk about while big Greg was stuck at the end of the bench, sidelined with injury. He also bought a puppy and named it Charles Barkley McLovin. That’s how he kept us from turning on him.

 
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