This longtime Northeast Portland dive is the black hole of hip. And I mean that in the best way possible. Where else can you stretch out in a U-shaped booth the size of a small New England state with a cheap rum and Coke and listen to a trio of fat men cover the Band's "The Weight"? Nowhere. And we haven't even tackled the wonder of karaoke night (Tuesday-Wednesday) or open mic night (Sundays) or the idea that this drinker's paradise opens at 7 am every damn day. The line of bar stools around the puffy-lipped stage and the strands of electric pink and blue running lights bordering the ceiling give the low-slung, half-a-century-old former bowling alley a strip club vibe. But the only flesh you're gonna see here is that of the aged dancing queens shuffling through a Texas Two Step on the parquet floor when the band kicks in with "Blue Suede Shoes" (the Carl Perkins version, of course).
What to drink: Anything the sassy young waitstaff gives ya. Probably a $1.75 Hamm's and a shot of whiskey.
Happy hour: $2.25 well drinks and 50 cents off beers 4:30-6:30 pm daily. Breakfast for $3, 7-11 am daily.
Entertainment: Live music, dancing, TV, karaoke, open mic, generation- and tax-bracket-spanning crowd.