When the "China" part of Chinatown was shanghaied to 82nd Avenue, Portland's downtown risked losing the marvelously seedy, dimly lit Chinese bars that were hubs for sailors, scoundrels and Chinese-banquet-goers alike. But lo, Chinese Village (520 SE 82nd Ave., 253-7545, chinesevillage.us) has them all, and they've brought along middle-aged cougars, video-poker sharks, crankheads, prostitutes and regular folks looking for strong drinks ($3 for an incendiary whiskey-Coke) or ridiculously greasy Chinese grub (including egg rolls dipped in batter—the culinary equivalent of playing Russian roulette with your left ventricle). The Village's friendly staff refers to the 10-11 am happy hour as "a nursing home full of geriatric lushes," and the specials don't stop there: Monday is ladies' night, while Tuesdays are for dudes. Chinese Village features some of the oddest people-watching in town (if you have good night vision), and it's thick with the spirit of those seedy bars of yesteryear, where a plate of fried rice could be followed by a drugging and abduction.