5. Whataburger

If one could cross-pollinate a Whataburger with a Burgerville burger and an In-N-Out burger, every other fast-food burger would just kill itself out of shame.

4. Carne guisada

Tender beef tips drenched in cheese and enchilada sauce.

3. Pulled-pork sandwiches

You haven't really had pulled pork until you've had a disgustingly huge helping of wet Texas pork and coleslaw on a fragile little bun.

2. Ribs

They're pretty tasty, but I'm too lazy to get obsessed with them. I need an intern.

1. Chorizo!

Especially on a migas breakfast taco, where tortilla strips, eggs and jalapeños combine to totally reinvent breakfast for the better.