927 SE Morrison St., 231-1606, sassysbar.com. 10:30-2:30 am daily.
Sassy's is like a party where everyone got invited: drunken art-school kids stumbling over from Yale Union, a ruddy-cheeked Canadian rugby team, a gaggle of bachelorettes. Heck, a member of Macklemore's entourage recently forgot a Macklemore LLC credit card out on its sidewalk. The always-packed, pink-tinged palace of comfortable decadence caters to all by emphasizing show-womanship over more direct appeals to sex. It's assumed you're just there to, you know, hang out—smoking on the back patio, eating the best strip-club steak in town (suck it, Acropolis!), drinking from a 30-tap bar. I've seen a bride go to Sassy's right after her wedding, just because she liked it so much. MATTHEW KORFHAGE.
Happy hour: 10:30 am-7 pm. $2.50 craft pints. Hooo!
Entertainment: Dancers, video poker.