John and Lucy Buchanan's departure from the Portland Art Museum leaves a new wing and big expense accounts to fill. But shed no tears for rank-and-file museum employees, who have been getting by on paltry pay and benefits under the current regime.

Who says infidelity doesn't pay? Oregon Capitol custodian Fernando Mendez snagged a $27,000 settlement from taxpayers after promising no workplace lawsuit against the state over his affair with ex-Rep. Kelley Wirth (D-Corvallis).

The U of O football team finishes 10-1 despite a midseason injury to the starting quarterback, its latest horrific-looking Nike uniforms and a Civil War speed bump (er, Oregon State) last Saturday. To be determined: whether 10-1 gets the Ducks into a big-bucks bowl or a

less-rewarding one.

Long-time Oregon Christian Coalition bigwig Lou Beres is off the criminal hook. Three female family members accused Beres of sexual molestation, but investigators found the alleged abuse happened too long ago to be prosecuted.

LOSERS

Brother, can you spare 500 million dimes? That's how much Portland Public Schools needs to close a looming $50 million budget gap after the Multnomah County income tax expires next year. Finding that cash got harder last week after the Beaverton School Board refused to participate in a regionwide income tax.

Bask in the fall sunshine, take in the views of Mount Hood, but don't breathe too deeply, fellow CO2 users. The weather pattern bringing us unseasonable sunshine meant stagnant air and local advisories last week against "unnecessary" burning and driving.

WWJD (What Will a Judge Do?): Portland's Catholic Archdiocese may need prayer to get through bankruptcy court in one piece. The archdiocese's $40 million offer to settle sex-abuse claims against priests doesn't cut it with victims' lawyers, and neither does the Church's claim that parish properties are off-limits for any payout.

The state's ethics commission socked Fire Bureau manager Mike Speck, who hired his son's company for a series of no-bid contracts, with a $6,000 fine last week. After WW broke the story in April, the bureau suspended Speck for a month without pay.