July 14th, 2006 5:33 pm | by MARK BAUMGARTEN Music | Posted In: Columns, News

Fake GNR to Play to Accountants in Leather

Appetite For DeceptionNot many people know that Portland is home to one of the best Guns 'N' Roses tribute bands in the world. But I'll tell you who will know come Aug. 6: Rich dudes who couldn't just enjoy Easy Rider, but decided they had to live it (along with some verifiable badasses that I am hoping will not want to kick my ass after reading this). That's right. Appetite for Deception be giving the folks at the annual Sturgis Motorcycle Rally the rehashed hits they not only want, but sha-na-na-na-na-na-na-need-need.

Witness this strangely worded press release:
Portland, Oregon based Guns N Roses tribute, Appetite for Deception would like to announce their engagement to the Full Throttle Saloon (the worlds biggest biker bar) at the Sturgis Motorcycle rally in Sturgis, SD. The band does a first class impression of Guns n Roses from 1986-1994. Appetite guitarist Izzy Killian says, "Since I first put this tribute together, I knew we would be the perfect band for Sturgis."

And if listening to Axl M. (real name unknown) sing "Mr. Brownstone" makes you and your old lady want to get hitched, here is a little advice from the Sturgis website's FAQ page:

Q: How do I get married during the Sturgis Motorcycle Rally?

A: You must go to the Register of Deeds Office located in the Meade County Courthouse at 1425 Sherman Street, Sturgis and obtain a marriage license. Both applicants must be present and show (1) form of identification each. There is no waiting period and same day marriages are legal. The marriage license is good for (20) days. You must locate and reserve your own Justice of the Peace or Clergymen to perform the marriage ceremony. Below is an informal listing of private legally licensed individuals that can perform marriage ceremonies.

So, when you sober up and realize what you've done, you need only wait 20 days until it means nothing. You don't even have to worry about the November rain.

Here's where the fakeness will occur:

The band is scheduled on the following dates, with more in negotiations:
08.06 - Full Throttle Saloon, Main Stage - Sturgis
08.07 - Full Throttle Saloon, Main Stage - Sturgis
08.09 - Full Throttle Saloon, Main Stage - Sturgis

Appetite for Deception: appetitefordeception.com
Sturgis Motorcycle Rally: sturgismotorcyclerally.com

Photo: Axl M's persona is fake, but his passion is real. From MySpace.
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