Apologies for this column's two-week absence. Your future drinker has been under the weather.

Silly things first: Two non-bar, non-restaurant businesses applied for liquor licenses this week. The first is The Modern Man Barber Shop at 5018 NE 22nd Ave., which is seeking to start serving whiskey in its waiting room. The second is Velo Cult, a San Diego bike shop that's relocating to a former antique mall (what else?) in Hollywood because owner Sky Boyer apparently likes being sad in winter. Boyer told Bike Portland he intends to open a "speak-easy": "We could have a bunch of smoking jackets hanging on the wall and you'll have to put one on to come in." According to the application, though, Velo Cult will only be serving beer. What's next? Jäger shots at Oil Can Henry's?

Onward!

Bandini Pizza & Pasta at Fremont and MLK has applied for a limited license.

In the pizza vein, Hillsboro looks to be getting a The Rock Wood Fired Pizza & Spirits, a chain with locations in Wood Village and several cities in Washington.

The former Mountain Shop building at 628 NE Broadway will soon become a Pizza Schmizza. When it opens, the existing Schmizza at 1422 NE Broadway will close.

Cannon Beach is getting a distillery. Go Cannon Beach! Something has to fill the long, dark winters.

A restaurant called Wraptitude (!) in Welches (!!) has applied for a full license.

Jofong, a video poker cafe at Southeast 83rd and Powell, will become D & M Bar, under the ownership of Zi Di Ou.

The west-side branch of Portland's Old Town Pizza has applied for a brewpub license, presumably to start brewing in-house.

The delightfully seedy Foster Gardens Tavern (see below) is changing ownership. Gary and Rebecca Powell have sold the bar to Mark A. Wittmeyer.

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