'Cause you don't even know what ripe is.
A less busy and more scenic route from Portland to Eugene than I-5, through the fertile promised land that inspired travelers on the Oregon Trail. Stop at produce stands and learn to instantly hate the supermarket.
Tire patches and a handlebar basket.
Because you never get to see bridges in Portland.
Eight rustic wooden tunnels—Crawfordsville, Gilkey, Hannah, Hoffman, Larwood, Shimanek, Short and Weddle—rare enough to be protected as historical landmarks.
A pair of garage doors—you can make a house!
Linn County covered bridges.
Unleash your inner Batman—hike through recessed caves cut behind the waterfalls.
Right off OR 214, South Falls dives 177 feet to a swimming hole, with a nearby lodge and gift shop. Park and strike out on the Trail of Ten Falls trailhead, which winds past nine more falls in just nine miles.
The Bat Poncho—the falls are misty even on sunny days.
To stop and smell the roses.
Twenty distinctive gardens, giant goldfish, carnivorous plants, a 400-year-old oak tree and every type of flower in the world (or so it seems)—for the same price as a boring old movie.
A good antihistamine, money for admission ($4-$10).
Finally, an excuse to wear that Mod Squad gear.
Oregon's only example of Wright's "Usonian"-style architecture, the Gordon House has his slick, retro signature that somehow feels old and modern at the same time.
Beatle boots, mock turtleneck.
Oregon Gordon House.
Even atheists like religious architecture.
A still-functioning Benedictine abbey—complete with chapel, gallery, retreat house and rare-book room—perched on a 300-foot bluff with stunning views of Hood, St. Helens and Adams.
A clean habit and plenty of piety.
Mount Angel Abbey.
To feel the wind in your mustache, just like Pre.
The track in Track Town, U.S.A., where Phil Knight, armed with a waffle iron and a dream, started plotting world domination. Every spring Hayward hosts international track stars at the Prefontaine Classic, and in 2008 runner's-high junkies will descend on Eugene for the U.S. Olympic track-and-field trials.
Anything with a Swoosh on it.
Ducks Hayward Field.
Skateboarding is the only thing that will save you from becoming a drug-addled preteen.
Over 29,000 square feet of flowing cement contours that Thrasher magazine called the best skate park in the world. Tony Hawk agreed. The park was built after more than 200 middle-schoolers petitioned the Parks and Rec district.
A helmet and humility—for the adolescent prodigies who'll make you look like the newbie you are.
Chehalem Skate Park.
To rub floaties with Portland's eclectic river rats.
Busy beaches, a (mostly) gentle river and an even split between drinkers and tanners. Lay out till you start to sizzle, then take dip (or a tube) to cool off.
A buoyant cooler full of beer. Cheaper = better.