I've been covering about big online sales for a week straight now, and I am as sick of writing about them as you are about reading about them. NEVERTHELESS, the Black Friday/Cyber Monday deals that I've been covering are still better than just about every other sale you'll find during the rest of the year. So if you haven't yet maxed out that credit card, or didn't yet find that one perfect thing you've been looking for, we're here for you buddy.

I've already ranted about mindless consumerism (above) this season, so here's a quick recap to my approach: Don't buy stuff you don't need. Don't buy stuff just because it is cheap. Do by stuff if you were going to buy it anyway and it is cheap. Do buy gifts for others, generously.

Now, here are my favorite sales. All of these are from brands that I or one of my writers personally endorse or are sales on things I have either bought or would buy.

(Courtesy of Powell’s)
(Courtesy of Powell’s)

Reading: It's not just for nerds anymore. Take 25% off of everything at Powell's online store, like chef  Joshua McFadden's (Ava Gene's) excellent cookbook Six Seasons through the end of the day.

(Adidas)
(Adidas)

North Greeley/Bavaria-based sportswear behemoth is hosting a 30% sitewide sale (some exceptions apply) with checkout code CYBER2017. If you live the Three Stripes Life like I do, you will be taking advantage of this discount.

It even looks like a spaceship, too! (Netgear)
It even looks like a spaceship, too! (Netgear)

As someone who works in an office with shitty wifi, there's almost nothing more infuriating than having your wifi fuck up in the middle of a project or activity. Luckily for you, you can drastically increase the quality of your wifi with a router, and Netgear's well-regarded, futuristic routers are on sale for the day. The Netgear Nighthawk AC1750 (pictured), which I use to excellent effect in my very own one bedroom apartment, is down to $70 (from $150) for the day, and I strongly recommend snapping it up if you've been having problems with connectivity. And if you're a homeowner or want something more powerful, the upscale, Alexa-enabled Nighthawk X6 is down to $140 (from $220). Or, shop around all of their products and see which one fits your needs best.

(Sony)
(Sony)

Owning a PS4 whips ass, and they rarely go on any kind of sale. We've seen a couple of short-lived deals over the last week, and today you can cop the new Pro model, which is 4K compatable, supports faster framerates and comes with 1TB of storage, for $50 off retail, down to $350. If you're thinking of buying a console for the holidays, I can tell you from personal experience that this is the one and today is the day.

If you've ever wondered why Calvin Klein is so famous and has so much money, buy a loved one a pair of his underpants and have them put them on. Klein's underpants make everyone look sexy, which is why they aren't usually cheap. But today they are, and if you want to get your sweetie a present you can both enjoy (*winks lecherously*), snap them up, and maybe a pair of jeans or two, for up too 55% off today only.

You’re fucking up big time if you don’t buy this. (Vitamix)
You’re fucking up big time if you don’t buy this. (Vitamix)

Here we have it folks: the best Cyber Monday sale. For those not in the know, a Vitamix is an extremely easy to use blender (there are three buttons) that uses a high-powered motor that can blend fast enough to liquify tough fibers in vegetables (e.g. kale) and emulsify fats.  I got a Vitamix blender for Christmas a couple of years ago, and it revolutionized the way that I cook: My soups and smoothies have never and will never ever be smoother.

These things are deservedly pricey because they're indestructable and come with a racecar motor, but you can get the 5200 model for just under $300 for today only, down from $550. This is an insane deal, and you'd be remiss to pass it up if you don't already have a high-powered blender.

I don’t know if it is possible to make a tablet cheaper. (Amazon)
I don’t know if it is possible to make a tablet cheaper. (Amazon)

Here is it folks: a tablet for $30. If you want a way to browse the web or read e-books in bed, you got it for as cheap as humanly possible. This is so cheap that it qualifies as a stocking stuffer. You can also cop the 16 GB one for $50, or get the 16 GB Fire 8 which is slightly bigger for $50.

Look, I went over all of the smart home stuff on Friday, and if you want the run down on that you can read it again, here. The time to get super good deals on smart home stuff is running out, so strike today with a Echo Dot & Fire TV stick combo for $55 and you can start yelling at your TV to play Stranger Things just like you've always dreamed.

(Cool Stuff is a new feature at Willamette Week where we feature product reviews, roundups, sales and other commerce and shopping-oriented content. All Cool Stuff reviews are editorially independent, meaning we provide honest reviews and aren't paid by the brands we write about. If you do choose to purchase something after following one of our links, Willamette Week may receive a commission, which helps fund our journalism.)