Though we encourage everyone to experience the flesh and flash of the Portland strip scene, few could afford to see them all in one night. That's because the City of Roses boasts the greatest number of strip clubs per capita of any city in America—one for every 11,286 residents. Here are our favorites.
927 SE Morrison St., 503-231-1606, sassysbar.com.
An iconic strip club in a city full of them, Sassy's feels more like your busy, friendly neighborhood dive bar that just happens to have extremely talented nude dancers than it does a skeevy strip club. The bar is backed every night of the week with service industry folk and visitors looking for a cheap drink, and the audience is always fairly diverse and mixed, while the dancers are almost uniformly tattooed.
Kit Kat Club
231 SW Ankeny St., 503-208-3229.
Winking from the depths of Ankeny Alley, this is a friendly club for first-timers and razzle-dazzle enough to amuse veterans. In addition to talented pole dancers, Kit Kat features visits from international contortionists and one dancer who solves a Rubik's Cube while hanging by her heels, slowly rotating upside down on the pole.
Spyce Gentlemen’s Club
210 NW Couch St., 503-957-5293, spyceclub.com.
Aware of the difficulty dancers had finding unique, functional outfits, local seamstress extraordinaire FSO maintains a rack in the dressing room that is periodically refreshed for girls to easily shop around their shifts. Newly remodeled, with four stages, three bars and the freshest 'fits across two floors, Spyce takes being a strip club seriously.
2839 NW St. Helens Road, 503-222-6600, casadiablo.com.
At Portland's infamous vegan strip club, novelty is queen. The food is vegan, the bills scattered across the stage are $2, and it isn't within walking distance of any other of the city's bounty of clubs. When you come here, the novelty costs a bit more, but you're sure to see something you haven't seen elsewhere.
129 SW Broadway, 503-227-3023, marysclub.com.
Mary's is a living monument to Old Portland in all its glory. Sporting La Monte Montyne murals depicting exotic women in a variety of locales, the bar has been topless since the '50s, and full nude since the '80s, when it famously hosted Courtney Love. Stick to $3.50 PBRs and buy the wisecracking dancers a drink between sets.