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There's a big problem with Hump, the annual amateur porn
festival put on by our dear friends at the local subsidiary of Seattle's
Stranger newspaper. Sure, it honors our city's DIY spirit. But
instead of capturing the true porn-theater experience, it's a sanitized
"zippers-up" affair. Enjoy something you see and wish to watch it again
in the privacy of your own home? Too bad, the films are destroyed
afterward, and recording the screen is lightly discouraged. That's all
fine for weekend warriors, but true aficionados of pornography and/or
public sex will be left wanting. Rather than going to another Hump, why
not try something a little less undergraduate? Remember to practice safe
sex, get consent and regularly check in with your partner(s).
MR. PEEPS' THE PEEP HOLE
709 SE 122nd Ave., 257-8617, mrpeeps.com.
Opened during Reagan's first year in office, Mr. Peeps is something of an institution. Its flagship location in Southeast Portland sports three showgirl booths, 21 arcade booths, and seven private viewing rooms. It also has plenty of toys and DVDs if you change your mind about the whole thing and want to go home.
You might also like: Fantasy Adult Video, Blue Spot Video, Fat Cobra, Paradise Video.
THE OREGON THEATER
3530 SE Division St., 232-7469.
Glory holes adorn the front right wall, and condoms are available at the entrance. The theater is noted for mostly catering to older men, but if you're looking for a place to watch porn and get off, this is it.
You might also like: Paris Theater.
KELLEY POINT PARK
North Kelley Point Park Road, 823-2223.
From cruisingforsex.com: "Been there a couple times the past couple weeks. Tend to be more the bear types but if you just wanna chill out for a while you will come across more athletic types. I saw in-shape guys going for a jog but [then] all veered off into the bushes."
You might also like: Washington Park, Mount Tabor, the I-205 bike path, really any park.
RON JEREMY'S CLUB SESSO
824 SW 1st Ave., 334-2577, clubsesso.com.
A swingers' club, Sesso is for people who know what they're into. It requires a membership to attend and has strict rules about cellphones and photography. The main downstairs area is a dance floor and bar. Elsewhere in the building are private rooms, including one designed for couples to watch each other, and another for orgies.
You might also like: The Velvet Rope.
COUNCIL CREST
Southwest Council Crest Drive, 823-7529.
Make-out points don't exist just in teen movies. They're real. As anyone who went to high school here can tell you, Portland's make-out point is Council Crest. It's got a beautiful view of the skyline, and plenty of parking and foliage for doing deeds. If you're not in high school, this is a weird place to go.
You might also like: Cleveland High dances, the back row of a multiplex theater, Hump.
GO: Hump 2014 is hosted by Dan Savage at Cinema 21, 616 NW 21st Ave., 223-4515. Wednesday-Sunday, Nov. 12-16. $18.
WWeek 2015