Fiona Apple hated being in Portland, and it's all your fault, Portland. Or at the very least, she called her concert at the Newmark Theater on Thursday, Oct. 3, "a historically stupid night." 

Why? As reported by WW contributor Robert Ham for the Stereogum blog, toward the end of her concert one of the fans in the balcony did a very, very Portland thing: They mistook insulting passive-aggression for empathy by yelling, â€œFiona! Get healthy! We want to see you in 10 years!” 

Or, as the old ladies say it in New York: "Eat some knish. You look so thin. And you're going to die, like really soon, you thin person who's thinner than me."

Apple responded angrily: “I am healthy! Who the fuck do you think you are? I want you to get the fuck out of here. I want the house lights on so I watch you leave!” 

Then, according to Grantland, another fan called her a has-been. The original fan, according to Ham, got another dig in, yelling, "I saw you 20 years ago and you were beautiful!" 

And that's when Portland made Fiona Apple cry. Hope you're happy, Portland.

Read Robert Ham's full account here. Read the part where Portland accidentally gave an ESPN affiliate the moral high ground here