Good news, everyone: Portland is no longer attractive to rich British people!
Every year, the hilariously named Monocle Magazine—a U.K.-based lifestyle periodical aimed at well-heeled Europeans who presumably dress like Mr. Peanut—publishes its annual Quality of Life survey, ranking the world's 25 most livable cities on such criteria as "how many kilometres of cycle lanes are there" to "how much rubbish is recycled by the city." (It is a very English publication.)
With those sort of metrics, you'd expect Portland to do pretty well, and it has. Last year, we landed in the No. 24 slot, praised for our "well-attended" Trump protests, "excellent food, lively neighbourhoods and legions of artisan businesses." We were, in fact, the only American city to make the list.
Sadly—or luckily, depending on how you feel about the city being put on blast for legions of Scrooge McDuck types—Portland has fallen out of the top 25. Now, there are officially no cities in the United States deemed livable for the aspiring Bond villains we imagine as Monocle's chief subscribers.
Munich, described as "at once relaxed and dynamic, cosmopolitan yet traditional," reclaimed the top spot. The only city in all of North America to make the list was Vancouver, B.C., which the magazine claims "offers better access to nature than any other city, and its dining scene continues to thrive."
Of the cities that have declined, Monocle writes that "some simply [fell off] because other cities have outshone them; others have perhaps rested on their laurels, not doing enough to embrace change when needed."
What, specifically, precipitated Portland's shameful exit from the list? It's unclear. But it's probably got something to do with our rubbish recycling skills.
The full article is behind a paywall, but you can watch a video containing short snippets on each city below and fume with jealousy and/or relief.